Clear intention: Quantum Leap to the Person You’d Like to Be, part II of II

Last week, we looked at making decisions as if we already are that incredibly successful and fulfilled version of ourselves.  What choices does she make in a day?  How does he think about himself?  What daily practices allow her light to shine more fully?

Here is a delightful role model story for us – about Bobby Fisher, World Chess Champion.  I first read a bit about his story in Steve Chandler’s transformative ebook, “How to Get Clients.” 

Fischer became the World Chess Champion in 1972 when he beat Boris Spassky.  While Fischer and Spassky had similar skill sets, Fischer also prepared for the chess match by swimming laps under water.

Spassky, an overweight smoker, viewed chess exclusively as a mental game.  Why focus on taking care of your body, when you use only your brain for chess? Because of his swimming, during the chess match, Fischer had more oxygen going to his brain than Spassky.

The more we understand the body/mind/spirit connection as Bobby Fischer did, the more we succeed in all areas of our lives.  Tending our body, mind and spirit gives us more energy and increases our availability to give.  We are more creative, positive and clear thinking.  We listen better, solve problems with more ease and grace, react more slowly and respond more fully and thoughtfully.

In my fourteenth month of practicing Kundalini yoga, I still feel a bit stunned by (and deeply grateful for) how much this weekly practice has strengthened me physically, clarified me emotionally, sharpened me mentally and softened me spiritually. And, I’ve lost 13 pounds!

As I quantum leap to a whole new level of supporting my clients as their right-hand business partner and spiritual business/life advisor, as well as their transformational coach, I am thrilled to make choices that call forth the best of me – body, mind and spirit!

What about you?  What, who, are you being called to?  What new choices can you make to support this New You?

 

Spiritual Clarity: Changing the Channel

On a recent teleseminar with Sonia Choquette about her new book, “The Answer is Simple . . . Love Yourself, Live Your Spirit,” I heard her say several times, “change the channel.”  Referring to more consistently choosing to live our spirits rather than our egos, she reminded us how to know the difference.

When we live from our ego, we need to control, be right and defend.  We choose from fear; feeling contracted, small and ineffective. 

When we live from our spirit, we’re loving, patient, intuitive, creative, open and courageous.  We feel expansive, confident and effective.

So, when we notice we’d like to change the channel to spirit, how do we do it?  The quickest way: do something we love, with bonus points if we’re moving our bodies and/or getting outside!

I keep a Top 12 list of things to remember to do each day to keep me feeling great, keep me living from spirit.  I have all my clients do the same.  Each person’s is unique.  Mine includes snow shoveling this time of year – I love snow and I get to move my body and play outside.  Many people do not like to shovel snow, but some love to hike or take their dog to the dog park, two things I don’t like and don’t do!

What’s on your Top 12 for Spirit list?  Write your list, post it where you’ll see it and you’ve created an easy way to change the channel any time you’d like!

Spiritual awakening: Discovering “your way” – energy for you, of you

To live our best lives from our best selves, we must discover what best fills our own cups, what energizes us, what fuels us.  We each have our own unique “energy recipe,” and we continue to enrichen our blend as we discover more about the best of ourselves throughout our lives.

Sometimes, we tend to put our spiritual life in it’s own box, “First, I’ll exercise, then do the laundry and then get to my spiritual activity.”  Yet, spirit (energy) runs through everything.  And, if we are open to it, we can experience spiritual awakening while exercising or doing the laundry, as well as when we are praying or meditating.

Knowing spirit, discovering energy from doing the laundry or in other aspects of our daily routines adds a beautiful spiritual richness to areas of our lives that we might otherwise consider as boring repetition or mindless chores.  Spiritual awakening involves recognizing spirit in everything.  Discovering what specific things most energize us and engaging in those activities more and more allows us to contribute more of our own personal best to the whole.

Several key areas of spiritual awakening in which we discover our unique energy ingredients:

  • Nature

  • Physical activity

  • Solitude

  • Community

  • Interests

  • Passions

Let’s briefly look at each one:

  • What two or three ways of being in nature most energize you? 

  • Which physical activities most restore you to your equilibrium? 

  • When you spend time alone, are you more energized by meditation, trimming bushes, reading, prayer, journaling, singing, chopping vegetables or . . .? 

  • Are you energized by spending time with your neighbors, one good friend, new acquaintances at a party, a group of children or . . .? 

  • Which of your interests do you get lost in? 

  • Which of your passions most ignite you?

Looking at each more closely . . .

Nature

I didn’t realize until I was well into my thirties how much nature energizes me.  Until then, I thought I didn’t like being outside much because I hated the hikes – I called them forced marches – that my mother made me take as a kid.  I also wasn’t too thrilled when she made us play outside for an hour in the winter, no matter how cold the day.

As I matured, I realized I love sitting on the river bank watching the water rush by me.  I also noticed how much I’m energized by the wide open landscapes of the desert.  The more time I spent in the desert, the more I realized how much comfort I receive from the moon.  And, I’ve experience many a spiritual awakening on the ski slope – as long as I allowed myself to go into the lodge before I got too cold!

What aspects of nature call to you? 

Spending time with animals?  Listening to trees?  Scaling sheer rock faces?  Rolling in the grass with kids?  Playing in a big lake?  Taking in the spiritual awakening on the ocean floor?

 

Physical Activities

I was as late a bloomer with knowing the energizing value of physical activity as with finding spiritual awakening in nature!  In high school, I took modern dance as my gym requirement, hoping to avoid sweating.  I learned the hard way that modern dance is a whole lotta work!  Only in the past 9 years (living 2 blocks from 314 acres of fabulous City Park) have I learned both the joy and spiritual awakening available in physical activity – dare I say exercise?!

Today, I refill my energy cup by walking in the park, riding my bike on errands, skiing in the winter and practicing yoga once a week.  I can’t imagine my life without this physical nourishment, yet I do remember telling people, “I’m just not a physical person.”  Of course, now I know better.  We are all physical people!  And, there are an infinite number of recipes for energizing ourselves through physical activity.

What physical activities support your spiritual awakening, call you to feel more alive? 

Do you get energized from “hard work” like chopping wood or making things?  Does your energy come from physical challenges like training for a marathon or swimming across the English channel?  Do you feel energized playing a team sport?

 

Solitude

I knew from a very early age that a good bit of my spiritual awakening came from solitude.  When I was five, I spent hours pulling the seeds from the four-o-clock flowers in our yard to later sell to our neighbors.  I spent many summer hours laying under a tree reading books.  As the oldest of five children, I cherished any quiet time alone!

Today, I am energized by and experience spiritual awakening when skiing alone, taking solo retreat in the desert, walking in silence, reading for many hours and making jewelry.

What type of solitude facilitates your spiritual awakening?

Do you get energized by camping and fishing alone?  Do you feel recharged when you chop vegetables for lunch or fold laundry after dinner?  Do you feel most alive deep sea diving?

 

Community

I’m much more of a one-on-one person than a group person.  And yet, I experienced a profound spiritual awakening at an Obama rally three days before he became president.  I’ve also felt energized by taking a strong stand on a neighborhood zoning issue.  I love the energy and spiritual awakening every time I go to church at Agape.  And, I give and receive so much energy in the tiny community of two with my best friend, Tama.

What aspects of community, what particular communities energize you, spiritually enrich you?

Do you feel a spiritual awakening when you volunteer your time with children or the homeless?  Do you get energized by leading your work group?  Do you feel more alive when you sing in your church choir?

 

Interests/Passions

I’ve had a love of “home” ever since nine years of age. I masterminded, and built with my sisters, a two-story, three-room fort – complete with carpet, screened and curtained windows and a safe . . . for snacks, of course.  Today, I am tickled pink that my 8-year-old-niece, Hailey, loves HGTV!  I get energized doing almost anything in my home.  And, just watching Hailey’s enthusiasm watching home design shows makes me feel more alive!

I’ve collected rocks since I was ten.  Still today, every time I visit the desert, I bring a few new rock friends home with me.  I feel Spirit in those rocks!

I can’t get enough of soul music.  I’m constantly on the lookout for new artists – one of the reasons I love attending church at Agape – even though it’s 1,000 miles from my home!  Listening to Rickie Byars Beckwith, Aaron Neville or Niki Haris sing from the bottom of their hearts facilitates a spiritual awakening in me so beautifully!

What interests or passions give you more energy, call to your heart, cause your spiritual awakening?

Ice fishing?  Restoring vintage Mustangs?  Riding your horses?  Inventing video games?  Sky diving?  Gardening?  Sail boating?  Remodeling houses?  Cooking for dinner parties?

 

Your unique recipe for energizing you . . .

Take the time to observe yourself – noticing when you feel most alive, when you are strengthened and give yourself – and the world – the huge gift of allowing yourself to spend more time engaged in the activities that cause you to feel more alive!

Here’s to our spiritual awakening . . .

I’d love to hear what you’re noticing!

 

Join a small group of like-minded coaches to spend 90 days discovering and implementing your way in the Thriving in 90 Days! program.  Begins Sept 24th. 

 

 

Spiritual awareness: Looking for “the way”

Often, when I start working with a new coaching client, they are looking for “the way.”  The way to get more clients, the way to feel more confident, the way to less overwhelm, the way to take better care of themselves or even the way to accept credit cards from their clients.

And, I remember when I hired one of my first and most expensive coaches, I hired her to learn the way, her way, to get new clients.  I paid her many thousands of dollars and did not learn the way.  I learned the hard and expensive way that asking to learn the way is not the best question – for anything from getting new clients to improving my yoga to cooking a delicious meal.  The way is different for every person.  My pricey coach’s way was not my way.  My way is not your way.

An effective approach to finding your way involves:

  • setting a clear intention: getting new clients, improving yoga or cooking a delicious meal
  • noticing where my excitement and energy is as it pertains to that intention
  • following that excitement, energy
  • course-correcting as the excitement and energy shifts and I get new feedback
  • Staying aware of the intention, the excitement and energy and the feedback until I have reached my intention

The trick to this far more effective approach involves not being swayed by thinking someone else has a better answer for you than you have for yourself.  By following your intuition, instinct, knowing, excitement and energy in each moment, you will always have the very best way for you.  If you try to follow someone else’s way, even a way that worked brilliantly for them, you have veered from your own unique compass.

Once we begin to recognize that following a formula is far less effective than being fully present in the moment, we begin to tap into the pure magic available to us in that moment.

I would love to hear your stories of following your way in the moment . . .

 

Conscious choice: Choosing from the best of you

Recently, I had a conversation that really stuck with me.  We were exploring the paradox of fully accepting who we are, how we are and a desire to grow, change.  If we constantly would like to grow, then isn’t there something “wrong” with us now?

I didn’t quite know how to answer that question at first. 

As a business and life coach, I support my clients in both growing and changing and accepting what is – exactly as it is, exactly as they are.  The more I contemplated and looked at my own growth path, I realized a wonderful distinction.

Each of us makes many, many choices in a day.  If our overall intention involves choosing from the most compassionate, loving, kind, present, aware, _______ (you fill in the blank) place that we can choose from in that moment, then we continue to grow and to accept what is at the same time!

I see a continuum, where on the one end, we each have the ax murderer version of ourselves and on the other end we each have the Dalai Lama version of ourselves (or any other low energy/high energy pictures we care to conjure). 

Now, someone cuts us off in traffic, ends a relationship with us or treats one of our children poorly.  We respond.  Do we choose to respond from a place on that continuum that is closer to the low energy or high energy end?  Do we handle the situation from a version of ourselves closest to the ax murderer or to the Dalai Lama?

So, it’s perhaps becomes less about us changing into something completely different, but rather making choices from the best of us more of the time? 

This is big!  I’m still pondering.  I would love your input and to hear your experiences.

Self-improvement: Living your best life

For each of us, there is a life that is uniquely and simply ours.  A life that comes from our specific soul: from our strengths, values and passions.

Yet, like a fish who doesn’t recognize how special and important water is for him, we humans often have blind spots about our own natural greatness.  

Someone compliments you on how empathic you were with the clerk at the grocery and you don’t quite understand.  Doesn’t everyone notice what’s going on with others?  No, we sure don’t!  Then you tell a friend how great it is that he always seems to know the most efficient way to organize a project and he doesn’t know what’s the big deal!

If you feel you are living anything less than the life that is totally, joyfully yours, take some time over the next few days to notice your specific strengths, values and passions.  What do you love to do?  What comes naturally to you?

Ask a few friends or colleagues what they notice you doing naturally or with enthusiasm.  What do people often turn to you for?  Advice?  In what area?  Help with fixing something?  What?  Getting something started? What?

Just by focusing on this for a few days, you will be living a life that is more fully, uniquely yours!

I’d love to hear what kinds of things you discover about yourself and your best life . . .

Self-improvement: Knowing my security from the inside

Every day for the past several days, I have been noticing anything I feel scared or anxious about and transforming it.  Working with the simple yet powerful concept that I already have everything I need inside me, I notice what’s causing the fear or anxiety and then find a way to know it from the inside rather than expect it from the outside.

I’d love to share a bit of my process so that you can use this transformation tool, too.

For example, in my business, I got scared and anxious when I felt enough money wasn’t coming in.  So, I asked myself:  why do I want the money?  What do I believe the money will give me?  I want the money to pay my bills.  I believe the money will give me security.  Okay, how can I feel, how can I be security right now?  

I don’t have to wait long for the intuitive answer to come to my conscious awareness.  Spending a few minutes laying on the ground, under a tree, being with the sky though the leaves of that tree helps me instantly feel plugged into All That Is and I feel secure.  Wow.  Easy.  Doable.  Highly effective.  Sure beats the alternative of panicking!

An example from my personal life:  I felt sad and scared when it seemed that a friend was “abandoning” me in a moment in favor of another friend.  Okay, why do I want my friend to “choose me?”  What do I believe me being chosen will give me?  I want to be chosen to demonstrate I’m valuable.  When I’m chosen, I feel important.  I feel I matter to that person.  Okay, how can I feel valuable, important and that I matter right now?

A couple of answers come to mind.  I have taken the time to put the focus on me and what’s going on with me.  I am valuing myself, prioritizing myself and indicating to myself that I matter to me!  And, I have many friends.  If I would like to spend time with a friend, I can value that experience for me and reach out to another friend.  Wow.  I know I matter and I feel valuable and important.

My whole life becomes better in two ways when I transform these “yucky” feelings.  First, I get to feel and be what I desire – secure and valuable, no matter what’s going on or what others around me do or don’t do.  Secondly, I am now in the energy of “security” and “valuable,” so I naturally attract more experiences of security and valuable, including more money flowing in and more friends who treat me like I am important to them!

I am so jazzed about this transformation process right now, I am considering teaching a 3-week, 1-hour each week tele-class for $89.

I would love your input.  

What about this tele-class might interest you?  If you took it, what would you most love to take away from it at the end of the 3 weeks?

Please take a moment to comment and give me the thoughts off the top of your head.  Thanks in advance!

Self improvement: We are what we make ourselves

I just got back from the Career Management Alliance annual conference in San Antonio where I gave a presentation: Strong You, Strong Biz: YOU Are Your Most Powerful Business Attractor. I feel humbled and grateful.

Back in the fall when I agreed to this engagement, I felt excited. Excited to connect with my people – other self-employed coaches, in their cases, specifically career coaches. Excited to embark on a new adventure with my new business partner at the time – she would man the expo booth and I would give the talk and we’d both have a great time doing it.

Fast forward a few months to the day when I learn that the majority of the conference attendees aren’t self-employed and are in fact in the military helping military folks transition to civilian life and jobs. And to the day when my new business partner can suddenly no longer be my business partner for several personal reasons.

Then I start dreading the conference. What do I know to help these military folks? How am I suppose to do it all myself? The conference organizer reassures me that plenty self-employed coaches will come to my talk. I don’t have to re-structure it for the military. My sister offers me some tips on giving my talk and man-ing the booth myself.

Yet, I still have a bad attitude.

Just a few days before the conference, I wake up and realize, just like I wrote on a plaque I gave my grandma when I was 15, that “we are what we make ourselves.” In good coach-like style, I remake myself.

I embody my talk. I can feel in my bones how good it is. As I prepare all the expo materials, I feel grateful for the opportunity to serve in this way. I see the entire trip flowing smoothly, from the moment the shuttle drives picks me up from my front porch to the time another one drops me back on my porch two and a half days later. I set an intention to have a good time, give all I am there to give and connect with wonderful people. I set an income goal for all the new business that will come from this event.

And guess what happened!

It went exactly like my intention, only one better. Many people from the military came to my talk, too. And they got huge value, slightly different value than the self-employed folks, but great value, just the same. Two military ladies even told me I was “under-selling” myself to just offer my services to self-employed professionals, because they saw how I can help them, too. So we are going to talk . . . I see that income goal being met and then some!

And, the shuttle driver on the way home even dropped me off at my house first!

 

Spiritual inspiration: Obama calls me to a better version of me (day 5)

Listening to Obama address Congress and the American people tonight, I felt called to do my part for humanity.  I’m not a civil-servant type, I dislike groups and until Barack Obama somehow crossed my radar screen about a year ago, I had zero interest in politics.

What strikes me about him again and again: he was born to do this very tough job.  He is clear and unwavering in who he is, what needs to be done and getting about the business of doing it.  And, inviting each of us to join him in doing our part.

I’m so new to this political thing, I don’t actually know what my part is yet.  However, having the honor and priviledge of serving as a business and life coach, I am not new to calling people to the best version of themselves.

So, for now, I ponder the question, “how can I take a stronger stand for that in which I believe?”   

Deepening spiritual awareness while slenderizing (day 2)

In my fourth month of practicing kundalini yoga, I find myself extremely physically challenged. And humbled by being so bad! Yet, every time I’m rolling up my mat to go home, I know I have surrendered to some deeper spiritual awareness. Strangely, I’m not entirely sure what that means . . .

I just know I must keep going – for my physical, mental, emotional and spiritual well-being. In the process of this spiritual awakening, I’m losing weight and belly fat!

Today, my teacher actually told me to get a hold of myself when I fell over while attempting a pose. She’s usually nurturing and encouraging, so I don’t know where that came from. Oddly, it didn’t offend me or hurt my feelings. And, I knew I would not be getting much together any time soon!

Ah, the rocky road to enlightenment . . .

Hey, I always thought that meant I would be more radiant. Maybe it means I’ll weigh less, too?!?