Your Gifts May Be Rough. Offer Them Anyway.

I’m excited to share the wonderful poem below by one of my mentors, Chela Davison. Chela consistently and insistently calls me to be more present with me and all of me.

Your Gifts May Be Rough. Offer Them Anyway.

Diamonds start rough and so do our gifts.
The measure of what we have to offer should not be in its popularity or “people getting it” or likes or uptake.
The measure of what we have to offer is by how much it’s killing us to keep it inside and who is suffering without it.
My friends, I know the fears.
“It’s been done before, it’s been said before, my ideas aren’t unique.”
“I’ll be judged or shamed or persecuted. Or worse, I’ll be boring, irrelevant.”
“It’s too noisy, peopl e want quick fixes, success and ethics don’t mix.”
“I’ll lose my loves. I’ll lose myself. I’ll lose.”
“I’m not ready. I’m not good enough. I need to be better.”
We forget that we’re animals. That we’re wild, that there’s freedom right here.
We’re looking for each other’s medicine. We’re looking for a safe den and a warm body to cuddle up to. We’re hungry for nourishment and have nourishment to offer.
Sure, the world is a dangerous place. Sure, it’s cut throat competitive out there.
Except all of the ways in which it is not.
We help to create those spaces, one by one, group by group.
No single one of us will heal and change what’s sick and broken.
But many.
Many of us, toiling on our own sacred curves of the Earth.
Our hands and hearts busy making love into things, reaching out in offering.
So what if your gifts are rough. Give them.
Our souls are weary, we don’t need polished diamonds.
We need each other’s medicine, in all forms, in all ways.
We’re waiting for you, hopeful that you’ll show up.

– Chela Davison, ChelaDavison.com

Waste of Time or My Strengths at Play?

Yesterday as I was preparing my fruit for breakfast, I took a spontaneous detour. I like my fruit room temperature (Individualization and Empathy toward myself) and I’d forgotten to take cuties out the fridge.

So I peeled a cold one and decided I wanted it warmer before I ate it. I started laying out the segments so they could warm quickly with air circulating around each individual segment. Activator and Strategic at work.

Waste of Time or My Strengths at Play AStrong

As I was doing that, my Maximizer, Connectedness and Strategic noticed a fun pattern. So, I created an amusing art piece for me, and now for you! And, after a few minutes, I ate it.

So fun!

What say you: waste of time or my strengths at play?

Join the conversation – comment below.

How Are You a Messenger of Love?

My Valentine’s gift this year opened my heart wider – to the glory of God. And, my sweetie and I shared that amazing experience. We both wondered if we were too old for an indoor arena concert, but choose to go see TobyMac live anyway!

It was crazy loud. And complete overstimulation for me. Quite surprisingly, it didn’t matter.

Somehow, I surrendered to that deafening noise and powerhouse energy. It broke me open, reminding me to the depths of my being that the Love and Oneness of God is my foundation and that I am a priestess.

I thought I was going to hear fantastic, uplifting music. Turns out that fantastic, uplifting music called forth more of who I am.

How Are You a Messenger of Love?

TobyMac, Mandisa and Ryan Stevenson

TobyMac himself inspired me by asking us to pray for him – that more songs may come though him that reach people. Indeed, we need more messengers of Love.

I have prayed for him. And I pray for you and me. That we may each serve more fully as the unique messenger of Love that we are.

Thank you TobyMac for being a powerful, and loud, messenger of Love!

Join the conversation – post your insights, feedback and experiences below.

What If You Are Your Biggest Supporter?

From Dictionary.com –
Advocate: person supporting an idea or cause publically.

What if YOU are the idea and the cause?

Take that in: YOU are worth supporting. Even publically.

This flies in the face of what we’ve been taught about not tooting our own horn. Why aren’t we suppose to toot our own horn? Because we’ll get too big for our britches? None of that even makes sense.

What If You Are Your Biggest Supporter?

Why would we acknowledge our own Beauty less than the Beauty of this glorious flower?

Each of us is an entirely unique emanation of the One. To be celebrated. Honored. Cherished. Supported. Shared with the world. In a positive way.

“Getting too big for our britches” is a human idea. Self-deprecating is a long-celebrated, passed-down-through-the-generations, completely nonsensical idea.

We are here in this lifetime now to fully express ourselves. Our humanity and our Divinity. We are here to support and advocate for that expression.

How much cleaner and more empowering than trying to cleverly manipulate others into advocating for us, give us their stamp of approval?

Self-advocating isn’t ego puffery. It’s seeing yourself and speaking about yourself the same way you would a child or grandchild, a dear friend or a beloved teacher.

The other day, I noticed that one of the participants in my Thriving Work Working Book Club had a new picture on her Facebook page. She looked radiant. When I shared that with her, she simply replied, “I love my smile in that picture.”

Beautiful, innocent, pure self-advocacy.

Join the conversation – post your insights, feedback and experiences below.

You Are a Spark of the One

Sliver of G

I am a Divine Emanation.
A Spark of the One.
Completely unique.

Never before.
Never again.

Only Now.
Brilliant, shining Now.

Sliver-of-G

I am a Sliver of G.
Goodness.
Genius.
Gumption in action.
Grace in the moment.
The Glory of God incarnate.

I am a Sliver of G.

Join the conversation ~ post your insights, feedback, experience below.

You Are Beautiful

When was the last time you told yourself you’re beautiful? When was the last time your bank teller told you? That was definitely a first for me last week.

I went into a branch of my bank that I’d never been in before.

As I was handing her my paperwork, I notice this small sign facing me on her computer machine.

You Are Beautiful

“You are beautiful.”

We had a delightful conversation about her sign, and I left the bank feeling beautiful. I also felt more connected to the human race because I often forget to see the beauty of each person.

I couldn’t help wondering how the world would shift if we all had uplifting signs at our work stations to remind us and our visitors …

As always, post your comments, experiences and insights below …

What Happens When We Don’t Censor Ourselves?

Are you watching AnnE with an “E” on Netflix?

If so, I’d love to hear how you’re loving it . . .

If not and you’d like your heart broken wide open in the best possible way, I highly recommend you stop reading this and start watching AnnE now.

She is so refreshingly, sometimes painfully, uncensored. She experiences life in it’s full spectrum, from the delectably scrumptious to her blunt observation of her own “ugliness.”

AnnENetflix400

Thirteen-year-old, AnnE quotes Jane Eyre, “If all the world hated you, and believed you wicked, while your own conscience approved you, and absolved you from guilt, you would not be without friends.”

Self-love 101. WOW.

I’ve watched 3 episodes and felt more alive and cried with every one. If you haven’t already, give yourself this gift.

Makes me want to add an E to my name.

As always, post your comments and experiences below…

If you’re a coach or consultant experiencing loss or turmoil, then join my new, private, free FB Group, Good Grief for hope around receiving the good in grief and support for getting your business back on track.

What Is the Right Place to Be Looking for Love?

A basket full of bread sits on your head; yet you go from door to door begging for crusts. Attend to your own head. Knock on your heart’s door.”
~ Rumi

No doubt Johnny Lee’s country song “Lookin’ for Love in All the Wrong Places” was inspired by Rumi! Here’s the thing, in his song, he references lookin’ into too many faces. Rumi tells us where to find the right face – directly beneath the basket of bread on our own head.

It’s wonderful to notice love and receive love from our loved ones, from all those around us, from complete strangers . . .

And, sometimes they’re preoccupied in their own worlds. Indeed, sometimes we ourselves are preoccupied and forget to love ourselves.

What Is the Right Place to Be Looking for Love?

May a basket of bread always remind us of all the love in our hearts, overflowing with love for ourselves.

Yet in any moment, with one new breath, we can simply remember the basket of fresh bread on our head and receive the nourishment and love of our own hearts.

As always, please post your thoughts and comments below …

A Peek into a Private Conversation about Self-Love

Today, I have the honor of sharing with you a private email conversation between me and one of my courageous clients, Hailey, (with her express permission, of course), exploring a bit about self-love.

“Ann, I’m sitting in my room with the window open listening to Nina Simone covers, feeling everything so deeply…

I’ve been wanting to touch more on the topic of self-love with you {my favorite 🙂 }.

If you feel comfortable sharing, may I ask what your road to self-love was like? I understand it’s an ongoing practice that we all must work to maintain. And, was there a moment in particular when you allowed yourself to step more into self-love and move away from harsh self-criticism/self-hatred?

Because, I often wonder if my self-consciousness and lack of self-acceptance will ever go away. I guess it really comes down to feeling peace in/with oneself.

When did you get to the point where you felt peaceful in who/what you are? I know each of us is on our own journey but I feel like it would be wonderful to hear your experience with this topic.”

A Peek into a Private Conversation about Self-Love

“Hi Hailey,

I’m happy to answer you and I don’t think there was one big ah-ha moment. Three thing I do know:

1. Coaching, talking deeply, to my niece Alisha for the past 16 years, since she was 11 (and I was 40) has really soften me toward myself. Sort of like I became aware of how much I wanted to support her in loving self-talk, so I had to do it for me, too.

2. When I was 34, my boyfriend died of a drug overdose before we could find help. I had to get really clear on why I chose to keep living. At that time, I realized it was about love. He was the most purely loving person I’ve ever known and I committed to honoring him by being more loving myself. And that started with me – loving me more unconditionally.

In a way, at that time, it was sort of easy because with so much grief, my defenses were down.

3. I really took to heart that thing about putting my own oxygen mask first (on the plane) before I try to help anyone else. If I wasn’t going to love and take care of myself, who would?

What might you hear in all of this for you?

Love, Ann”

“Oh Ann, THANK YOU. This is beautiful. I’m grateful for you sharing all of this with me. Truly, it means a lot to me.

I am hearing SO many things in all of this; I mostly asked the question because I sometimes wonder if it’s even totally POSSIBLE to love oneself and thus be in flow. I’m hearing that life can be full of suffering in one moment and full of beauty and magic in another moment. I’m hearing proof of the human condition!

I also hear that pain softens you. I totally understand this. It’s almost as if pain breaks you open in a way that allows for the possibility of more love to flow in. At least that can be the case sometimes.

I’m hearing that perhaps there is no correct path to the “enlightenment” I’m looking for, aka total self-acceptance. I’m hearing that it’s mostly about choice – do I choose to accept myself in THIS MOMENT or do I not? It’s simply a yes or no question.

I’m remembering a conversation we had where you mentioned that sometimes you don’t even need your coach to answer questions because you’re able to answer them yourself just by asking the question in the coaching space.

I feel that way in this situation. I know what to do and I suppose I was just looking for an affirmation in another person’s experience other than mine. Because, like I said, sometimes I feel so much resistance to myself and the way things are that I doubt life will ever be truly peaceful. I understand now that life’s one moment at a time.

Thank you for reflecting on this with me Ann.”

So, what about you? What do you hear in this for you?

What If There’s Huge Value in Not Reaching Our Goals?

Two of my clients didn’t reach goals around their health this year. Another didn’t reach his financial goals. I had high hopes for getting my two-year-old cat, Miles, healthy by the end of the year. We aren’t there yet. This may sound strange coming from a coach who makes her living helping clients reach their goals.

So, here’s the thing: When we don’t reach the goals our human ego sets, we have the opportunity to create a deeper, more intimate relationship with ourselves. We become a new person on the way to achieving the human goals. And, we get further in those human areas than if we hadn’t set the goals.

The two clients who have goals around their health are becoming far more self-compassionate, self-loving and their own best friends.

The client with financial goals is learning to give himself credit for being in the process. He’s also learning about his inner security as he works on his outer security.

What If There’s Huge Value in Not Reaching Our Goals?

As for me and Miles, I’ve gotten to experience his unconditional affection, no matter how he feels. I’m learning patience and accepting what is. I’m learning that me being nervous and frustrated affects both of us poorly.

For all of us, we have the opportunity to set new goals, perhaps with a bit more wisdom about ourselves.

So what about you? Are there goals you didn’t reach this year? If so, how might you find the huge value for you?

As always, I’d love your thoughts and comments below.

Happy Solstice!