Living from the Inside Out

What Good Life Is Just Beyond Acceptance?

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Earlier this week, I drove to Denver to facilitate a StrengthsFinder team development for one of my coaching clients. As is want to do this time of year, it was snowing and the roads were icy for about the first 45 minutes of my drive.

I could hear the typical conversation in my head about how it would be fine for me to drive in the snow if it weren’t for all the other pesky drivers. And, perhaps because I had only myself to talk to, I reminded myself that the experience of my life is created from within me, not by external circumstances outside of me (those pesky drivers).

So, I decided to accept the other drivers and drove for a few minutes without saying much to myself. And, then I had an insight.

What if I put my focus on my relationship with the road? What if I noticed that I am One with the whole experience – the road, the snow, the other drivers? What if I allowed myself to receive the beauty of the experience?

Instantly my experience shifted from one of stress and tolerating to feeling relaxed and knowing I am always supported. I had a palpable experience of the state of grace in which I live – if I only but notice.

On my drive back from Denver, I was present to the glory of this moment with the majesty of the Spanish Peaks near Walsenburg, Colorado.
On my drive back from Denver, I was present to the glory of this moment with the majesty of the Spanish Peaks near Walsenburg, Colorado.

Maybe 15 minutes later, the traffic thinned and there was no longer snow and ice on the road. And, my awareness of receiving WHAT IS stayed with me throughout the rest of the trip.

(Excerpted from my forthcoming book, “Strong from Within: Simple perceptions and practices for returning to the joy of you”)

What Is the Wonderful Value of the Darkness?

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This time of year I tend to notice I’m in the minority with my love of snow and cold and darkness. As we approach the winter solstice, I love to reflect on the value of winter and the dark.

Winter calls us inward. The darkness asks us to slow down. The cold invites cuddling. Snow quiets us and requires we pay more attention to our driving.

House in winter

Hibernation season offers this wonderful opportunity to be with ourselves. Contemplating, reflecting, pausing and becoming. Very different from the accomplishing, moving, striving and doing of the “holiday season” and our culture in general.

When you pause for a moment, can you hear the quiet invitation to go inward? To become still? To allow? To be?

And, it’s totally cool if you’d rather do it on a sunny beach!

(Excerpted from my forthcoming book, “Strong from Within: Simple perceptions and practices for returning to the joy of you”)

What Is the Beauty of the Whole Human Experience?

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Thirty years ago, when I discovered the Power of Positive Thinking and a bit later that My Thoughts Create My Reality, I was thrilled. I felt like I had been given the keys to the kingdom. A simple success formula: think happy thoughts, have a happy life.

Yet, something seemed off and my life often wasn’t happy.

Over the years, I tried many versions of the formula. I wrote positive affirmations, read uplifting books, hired a coach to help me raise my vibration and attended Create Your Best Life webinars and seminars.

While they all seemed like good ideas, I could tell that something still didn’t fit for me. Without knowing what was missing, I moved on.

More accurately, I thought I had moved on. Four years ago, I wrote my first book, Thriving Work. With a subtitle of “A journey to your best self…” I see now that a journey to my best self abandons my “worst” self somewhere along the path.

The book includes 33 affirmative prayers. 27 of them are written from the power-of-positive-thinking perspective, 4 point toward being ourselves fully (all the “good” and “bad”) and 2 directly address including all of ourselves (“All of Me, None of Me” and “From the Fullness of You”).

When I wrote the book, I didn’t sort the prayers that way. I simply wrote what I knew at the time. All of the prayers have been wonderful companions on my life journey. And, they have uplifted and positively impacted many readers.

Only recently, did I come to realize the missing link.

We don’t always control our thinking. And, when we do temporarily manage to control our thinking, we cut off part of our human experience.

I love how Michael Neill describes this. “If we think we are meant to be in charge of what we think, we feel like victims of our own inadequacy, and that if we only tried harder/were more vigilant/had better techniques we would have everything we want and could always be happy and never angry, fearful, or sad.”

What Is the Beauty of the Whole Human Experience

Now that I am beginning to realize thoughts are like clouds, I allow them to be how and what they are, without taking them too seriously. I allow all of them, without trying to make them positive. And I consciously (as best I can in any moment) choose which ones to act on and which ones to allow to pass.

Without needing to control my thoughts, I’m relaxing more. I’m enjoying being human, without so much vigilance. When I notice my thoughts are less than positive, I remember I don’t need to be so concerned with the content of my thoughts.

I’m making less distinction about “good” and “bad.” I’ve spent so much of my life avoiding what I consider “bad,” and it’s been exhausting.

I’m becoming more and more aware that this moment is my life. When I am present in the moment (however “good,” “bad” or in-between), it is somehow wonderful regardless. Now that is the beauty of the whole human experience!

(Excerpted from my forthcoming book, “Strong from Within: Simple perceptions and practices for returning to the joy of you“)

3 Keys for Learning to Love Life

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I had one of those life learning experiences this past Sunday, flying back home to the Land of Enchantment from LA. When I checked to see if my flight was on time, the Southwest website could not give me that info, due to a “system-wide technology delay.” The site admonished me to be to the airport at least 2 hours ahead of my flight time.

At the airport, one look at the length of the security line made me think it would take longer than 2 hours to get through that line alone. My first thoughts were, “I can’t do this. I don’t want to do this.” Walking and walking and walking toward the back of the line along the street, my next thoughts were, “It is what it is. I have no idea what will happen. It seems like the next logical thing to do is to get in this line.”

Typically, this type of experience would feel extraordinarily stressful to me. The heat on the street, the chaos of so many people having no idea what’s going on, not knowing if I would have enough time to make my flight, my phone having only about 13% charge, my boarding pass on my phone . . .

I made it through security in about 50 minutes. I was able to show my boarding pass to the initial security person inside the building and the official security person at the security checkpoint with 6% charge to spare. I found a floor outlet everyone else had overlooked to charge my phone to 30% to show the gate attendant. I had time to go to the bathroom and get a bottle of water. And, my flight took off only 10 minutes late.

What a strange and wonderful experience to be loving life in the midst of circumstances that used to cause me stress.

What a strange and wonderful experience to be loving life in the midst
of circumstances that used to cause me stress.

What would have been 2 hours of extreme stress in the past turned out to be a well-choreographed dance. What had shifted for me?

1. Which thoughts do I choose to act upon? Which thoughts do I allow to pass, giving space for something new?
I allowed my initial thought of fleeing to pass without acting on it. That gave some space in my mind to notice that it was probably most logical to get in the security line, even though I didn’t want to.

2. Don’t try to do better. Don’t make it worse.
I wanted to listen to music to make the situation more bearable. Not an option with so little charge on my phone. Then, I wanted to beat myself up for not arriving at the airport with a fully-charged phone. I did neither and simply allowed myself to be human with lots of other humans, hanging out in the present moment.

3. There is only now. This present moment is my life.
Once I remember that this moment, this string of moments, is my life, I relaxed. I didn’t concern myself with the length of the line. I would either make it to my plane before it took off, or I wouldn’t. Either way, I would be with that in that moment.

I asked the guy in front of me what he was learning about the situation on his phone. I talked with the guy behind me about Denver, his destination, and Santa Fe, mine. I love talking about Colorado and New Mexico. I was patient with myself when I pulled up the wrong boarding pass at the security checkpoint. I was kind to the security guy, even though he wasn’t so patient with me.

I lived in the moment all the way home. I loved myself and I loved those around me, realizing we all were in the same boat. When I noticed someone experiencing stress, I took a moment to see them in a love bubble. I was living my good life in the midst of chaos.

What about you? What do you notice in these 3 Keys?

(Excerpted from my forthcoming book, “Strong from Within: Simple perceptions and practices for returning to the joy of you”)

How I Realized the Value of Empty

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I know that my thoughts and feelings create my experience of life. And, I am still sometimes tempted to change external circumstances to shift my experience.

I’m especially prone to this in the area of spiritual study. I tend to think if I read the right spiritual book or listen to an uplifting audio, then I will “feel better.”

Recently when neither “worked,” I called my coach. She asked me if I’d done any silent meditation or shaking (a simple body practice to release from my body anything I don’t need).

I hadn’t done either, so I immediately did both. And, they did “work.” I finally felt better. More present, more light. Now this was super curious to me because I know that my experience of life comes from the inside, from my thoughts and feelings. Yet, I had just changed my experience of life by the external shift of meditating and shaking.

What was going on?

Now that I was more present and lighter, I had more capacity to be curious without judgment. And I had a light bulb moment. When I was reading and listening to the audio, I was filling my head with more thoughts, which also created more feelings. This compounded my “problem.”

When I did my silent meditation and shaking, I was emptying. Less thought. Less feeling.

It would be easy now to think that I must do silent meditation and shaking to feel good. What actually helped me feel better was having less thought as a result of meditating and shaking.

No wonder I love trees without leaves and wide open space - empty feels good to me!
No wonder I love trees without leaves and wide open
space – empty feels good to me!

Less thought and new thought are always available. This particular time, less thought happened via meditating and shaking. How wonderful is that? And, next time, new thought might happen from noticing a billboard. Or, my thoughts might settle down when I’m falling asleep.

While we can’t control when we’ll have fresh thought or less thought, we can be grateful when it comes and gentle with ourselves until then!

(Excerpted from my forthcoming book, “Strong from Within: Simple perceptions and practices for returning to the joy of you”)

The Source of Our Experience

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Recently I had to sort out something between my doctor, insurance company and pharmacy. Not fun. I realized that the root of my frustration and anxiety was about feeling powerless.

While waiting for replies from them, this piece, Returning to Center, came to me. It reminds me that regardless of how it looks, I am Source. When I remember I am Source, my energy shifts and the external world shifts, too.

Instead of continuing to try to strong-arm things into place (yes, I am good at that :), I decided to leave it alone until the next morning. By 9:30 am, they had worked it out themselves.

To returning to Center, again and again . . .

Returning to Center

Returning to Center

Off balance.
Out of sorts.
Beside myself.
Ah, to be human.

Remembering.
Center.
Returning to Center.
Ah, to be Divine.

Disconnected.
Defending.
Feeling separate.
Out of control.

Connected.
Clear.
Open.
Returning to Center.

Messy misery.
Miraculous Center.
Ah, to be Divinely human.

Returning to Center.
Again and again.
Again and again.

No judgment.
Returning to Center.

All.
One.
Center.

Returning to Center.

(Excerpted from my forthcoming book, “Strong from Within: Simple perceptions and practices for returning to the joy of you”)

What do you notice for you?

Mindfulness: The Source of Suffering and Happiness

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“Our level of awareness at any given moment determines the quality of our experience.”
– Michael Neill
From the book, The Inside Out Revolution

A few days ago, I woke up in a low mood, feeling a little anxious. Immediately, I started searching my mind for the cause. And then I caught myself.

I know that my thinking causes my moods. And, I am still sometimes tempted to believe that some outside circumstance caused me to feel blue.

So, I discontinued searching my mental hard drive and got about my day. A couple of hours later, after I had finished working with a coaching client, I noticed that the low mood had vanished.

I had to smile. Of course it had. Whenever I work with a client, I experience life from a higher state of awareness. I consciously structure our time together to make sure of that.

Even if I’m in a low mood when the client calls, I shift before we begin our work. I ask them if they want to leave anything outside the door. I’ve already noticed inside me if I want to leave anything outside the door.

How liberating to realize that my own thoughts and my own level of awareness create my suffering or my happiness . . .
How liberating to realize that my own thoughts and my own
level of awareness create my suffering or my happiness . . .

Then, I create a new space for both of us to experience a higher state of awareness. I lead us through a formal opening for our time together.

How I do that depends on the client. It could be as simple as taking two deep breaths together. Or, we might listen to one note on a chime until it dissipates. Or, I’ll lead us through an affirmative prayer or draw a Soul Coaching card for them.

So, after working with my client, I felt great. I was experiencing a high mood. And, when I thought about the things that I had thought about from the low mood, I had an entirely different perspective.

From my low mood, taking the car for an oil change felt like a burden. From my high mood, I felt great about taking good care of the car and happy I found an excellent mechanic in Santa Fe.

From my low mood, I felt cranky about having to write metatags for my new website. After working with my client, I felt excited to get them written, because they would help more people find my website.

And the list goes on. You get the idea. An oil change or meta tags don’t cause my suffering or my happiness. My own thoughts and my own level of awareness create my suffering or my happiness.

I love to use tools, like the formal opening for coaching sessions, to keep my awareness level high.

What about you? If tools are fun and helpful for you, too,
I’m so excited to share a package of three tools with you:

Oak Tree

Strong from Within, 1 – The Quick Audio Package
(3 recordings)
All recordings by Ann Strong

  1.  You Are a Fountain of Blessings
      5-minute meditation
  2.  Divine Authority
      2-minute affirmative prayer
  3.  Source
      1-minute reality reminder

I found a wonderful platform from which to share this package. It allows you to name your price – even free!

My suggested price is $6.75 for the package of 3. And, if you don’t want to use your credit card on the Internet or your personal development account is taxed, then please accept this package as my gift!

I received feedback from several people a couple of weeks ago that naming your price made them nervous. How do they know if it’s worth $6.75 or $50.00? If they don’t pay, will I judge them? I totally hear you.

If you’re thinking something like that, please don’t deny yourself these wonderful recordings – get them as my gift. I not only won’t judge you, I will be thrill to be of service to you!

And, if you’d like, drop me a line about your thought process so that I can make them super accessible to anyone who wants them.

For further details, to purchase and for immediate download, click here.

Post comments and insights below . . .

Creator/Owner Mindset: I Can’t Believe I Fell into this Hole

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There I was walking my talk. Like a great coach. And then I fell in that same hole – again.

Let me back up to the beginning.

I had been in a low mood for a day and a half. For a couple of weeks before that, I had made several invitations to people I would love to coach. All of them had said “no.”

I then attributed my low mood to “nobody wanting coaching.” That’s the moment I fell in the hole. But I didn’t realize it at the time.

low mood; falling into a hole

My mood got lower and lower. I felt disoriented and couldn’t focus. Talking with my own coach barely helped. That’s when I knew something was way off, but I still had no idea what it was.

I looked for reasons that my mood was going lower and lower. I knew better than that. I knew that the best way to deal with a low mood involves being graceful with myself and allowing it to pass. I knew better than to engage with it.

I knew better than second-guessing why I got a bunch of “no’s.” I know that no means “next.” In this particular time, I had a bit of amnesia – forgetting all that I know from selling my entire life.

Bless my coach. She was not going to leave me in this place. She sent me a snippet of a video that reminded me about my own power in my ability to choose and my ability to believe.

I immediately, beam-me-up-Scotty style, ascended from that hole. I had given away my power to choose and my power to believe. I flew out of the hole when I realized I could choose and believe again with that very breath.

Oh my God, how can I more consistently remember that I write the story of my life? I’m not in charge of when others say “yes” or “no.” I am in charge of remembering that my life is created from what I think about my life, not what happens “out there.”

Thank goodness for this profession of coaching. A sane, firm, persistent and loving voice when in a moment, I’d gone a bit off the rails . . .

What about you? How do you bring yourself back to remembering the truth of who you are when you forget a little bit?

I’d love to hear from you.

Post your comments and insights below.

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My book, “Thriving Work” is now available
on Kindle at Amazon for just $3.99:
Click here to order

Allowing Flow: Present and Curious

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Awhile back, in the middle of a tense conversation with my sweetie, I could feel my mood going lower and lower.  Instead of engaging fully in what was quickly becoming an argument, I instead got curious.

What would it take to not go to a low mood?

Instead of firing back my good argument, I sat quietly, looking at the clouds.  Really looking, being present to the wonder of the clouds.  All of the sudden, my argument became irrelevant.  In an instant, I lost interest in proving my point.

I told him I didn’t need to go on, that I could let it go.  And I did.  Just like that. My mood immediately bounced back up.

Blog Post 061114

Some of my best friends are trees and clouds.  The
more time I spend outside, the more present I become.
The more present I am, the less I get upset with the
“small stuff.”

What had happened?  How did I access that beautiful miracle?  I became more interested in a high mood and connection (to the clouds, to me, to him) than in “winning” an argument.  I held the situation lightly and became present to the moment.  In the preciousness of the moment, the argument made no sense.

When we begin to notice more consistently that our innate well-being is always available, we naturally begin to make more choices consistent with it.

So, what about you?  What does this bring up for you?

Feel free to post your comments, insights and experiences below.

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Are you in the Denver area?

Want to spend an afternoon diving into your strengths? 

Or diving a bit deeper if you’ve been playing with yours for awhile?

We have a few spaces left in an experiential StrengthsFinder workshop on Wed, June 25.

Is one of them yours? Come play with us!

http://www.annstrong.com/strong-you-strong-life

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My book, “Thriving Work” is now available
on Kindle at Amazon for just $3.99:
Click here to order

Affirmative Prayers: I Was Born for This

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Today I offer you one of the poems/affirmative prayers from my forthcoming book with a working title of:  Strong from Within: Simple perceptions and practices for returning to the joy of you.

 

I used to wonder
Why does nobody see this?
Why hasn’t this already been done?
Why do I want something
that nobody else seems to want?

Doubt, self-judgment.
Telling myself to be happy with what is.

Yet, it didn’t leave me alone.

If only we could each be as clear as this magnificent tree, I was born for this.

If only we could each be as clear as this
magnificent tree, “I was born for this.”

And so I began to realize
This is mine.
My part.  My vision.  My love.

This is why I’m here.
I was born for this.

My expression.
My contribution.
Expressing and gifting
what I alone can give.

My way.
Unusual.  Precious.  Needed.
My full expression.
Contributing to the Whole.
I was born for this.

I was born for this.

So, what about you?  What were you born for?  If you’re not sure, what’s your next step in knowing?  How can I help?

Feel free to post your comments, insights and experiences below.

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My book, “Thriving Work” is now available
on Kindle at Amazon for just $3.99:
Click here to order