Self Acceptance: Noticing my ego take a ride

After I wrote about bringing attentiveness, clarity, generosity, strength and love to situations and interactions last week, I quickly got to experience falling short!  Ah, to be human . . .

I go to the same coffee bar almost every day and have playful interaction with most of the baristas.  A few days ago, I took it too far. I was in line behind an older gentleman who got confused several times while ordering his drink and cookie.  At one point he even asked if he’d ordered a cookie that sat right in front of him.  The barista patiently and kindly answered all his questions, and then exchanged a frustrated glance with me.

I then ordered my coffee and chatted with the barista about our weekends.  While walking out the door, I asked him as a joke, my coffee in hand, “did I order a drink?”

As soon as I said it and saw him glance out to the patio, I felt bad.  The man with the cookie was sitting on the patio, probably didn’t hear me, but what if he had?  

I reflected on why I had made a joke at someone else’s expense.  I like being a regular.  I like having a personal relationships with the baristas.  And, ick, I wanted to feel superior.  To someone who was having a tough time in the moment.  Ouch.  Okay, no wonder I felt bad.

So, while driving home, I fully felt feeling bad.  Then I offered compassion to all of us – the man, the barista and me.  Then I forgave myself and let it go with a strong resolve to bring more attention to a situation before I react from my ego.  Ah, the practice . . .

Affirmative Prayer: In the Eye of the Storm

Knowing My Solid Foundation

After I wrote about embracing change last week, it didn’t take me long to realize that I needed to consciously be aware that my life has a solid, unchanging foundation.  That makes embracing change a whole lot easier!

I cannot control everything that happens.  Heck, some days I have a sense of how very little I control!  What I CAN control involves what I bring to any situation, any interaction.  I choose attentiveness, clarity, generosity, strength and love.  In the moments that I fall short of bringing any of those qualities to the table, I then choose compassion, detachment and forgiveness!

I have been using this affirmative prayer to remind me of and connect me to my solid foundation.  It helps me stay on or get back on course.  Perhaps it can support you as well . . .


In the Eye of the Storm

With so much chaos in our world,
I have found it more important than ever
to deliberately choose my way of being.  

I don’t know what will happen later today or tomorrow,
but I do know that I choose to bring my
attentiveness, clarity, generosity, strength and love
to whatever it is.
I do know that I choose to connect
more frequently and deeply
with those I love.

Reaction is no longer something I choose to indulge.  

Instead I choose to be present with whatever is,
allowing it to move around and through me,
without attachment or resistance.

And, once again I choose to bring my
attentiveness, clarity, generosity, strength and love
to whatever it is.

To create your own solid foundation, join us for the Thriving in 90 Days! program starting Sept 24th. 

Spiritual awakening: Embracing change

Since I have tended to like things to stay the same, today I’ve decided to consciously change my relationship with change! In the past (quite recent past, actually), I’ve had a tendency to love having the same friends, car, vacation spot, phone, clients, coffee drink, and hairstyle for many, many years.  Sometimes that works, sometimes it doesn’t.  When it doesn’t, I tend to get cranky or super cranky!

Lately, I’ve noticed things seem to be changing waaaaaay faster than they used to.  Businesses come and go, the nature of my friendships change frequently, I need to learn new technology every day, my deli changes the dressing they put on my Italian sub, clients want different kinds of support, my toothpaste company quits making my flavor.  I’ve grown a bit weary of cranky and super cranky, so I’ve made up a new inquiry for spiritual awakening.

Instead of doing what I’ve always done, I’m checking in with my intuition more.  What would feel great in this moment?  Would I most love an Italian sub or does something else on the menu sound even better for me in this moment?  How does this new phone serve me better than the old one now?  What color feels energizing for me to wear today?  Which new client program would I like to offer now?

I’ve noticed that my own spiritual awakening involves opening myself to whole new ways of perceiving situations, seeing with fresh eyes, allowing myself not to just adapt, but rather to thrive.  Who knew I could love Twitter?

And, if all else fails, loving what is, as Byron Katie would say.  “What, it’s raining again?  It’s not suppose to rain this much in Colorado!”  Ah, loving what is . . .

I’m thinking that change is pretty much guaranteed!  So, I’ve made the very wise decision that I’d rather embrace it and flow with it, rather than fight it.


Spiritual awakening: Discovering “your way” – energy for you, of you

To live our best lives from our best selves, we must discover what best fills our own cups, what energizes us, what fuels us.  We each have our own unique “energy recipe,” and we continue to enrichen our blend as we discover more about the best of ourselves throughout our lives.

Sometimes, we tend to put our spiritual life in it’s own box, “First, I’ll exercise, then do the laundry and then get to my spiritual activity.”  Yet, spirit (energy) runs through everything.  And, if we are open to it, we can experience spiritual awakening while exercising or doing the laundry, as well as when we are praying or meditating.

Knowing spirit, discovering energy from doing the laundry or in other aspects of our daily routines adds a beautiful spiritual richness to areas of our lives that we might otherwise consider as boring repetition or mindless chores.  Spiritual awakening involves recognizing spirit in everything.  Discovering what specific things most energize us and engaging in those activities more and more allows us to contribute more of our own personal best to the whole.

Several key areas of spiritual awakening in which we discover our unique energy ingredients:

  • Nature

  • Physical activity

  • Solitude

  • Community

  • Interests

  • Passions

Let’s briefly look at each one:

  • What two or three ways of being in nature most energize you? 

  • Which physical activities most restore you to your equilibrium? 

  • When you spend time alone, are you more energized by meditation, trimming bushes, reading, prayer, journaling, singing, chopping vegetables or . . .? 

  • Are you energized by spending time with your neighbors, one good friend, new acquaintances at a party, a group of children or . . .? 

  • Which of your interests do you get lost in? 

  • Which of your passions most ignite you?

Looking at each more closely . . .


I didn’t realize until I was well into my thirties how much nature energizes me.  Until then, I thought I didn’t like being outside much because I hated the hikes – I called them forced marches – that my mother made me take as a kid.  I also wasn’t too thrilled when she made us play outside for an hour in the winter, no matter how cold the day.

As I matured, I realized I love sitting on the river bank watching the water rush by me.  I also noticed how much I’m energized by the wide open landscapes of the desert.  The more time I spent in the desert, the more I realized how much comfort I receive from the moon.  And, I’ve experience many a spiritual awakening on the ski slope – as long as I allowed myself to go into the lodge before I got too cold!

What aspects of nature call to you? 

Spending time with animals?  Listening to trees?  Scaling sheer rock faces?  Rolling in the grass with kids?  Playing in a big lake?  Taking in the spiritual awakening on the ocean floor?


Physical Activities

I was as late a bloomer with knowing the energizing value of physical activity as with finding spiritual awakening in nature!  In high school, I took modern dance as my gym requirement, hoping to avoid sweating.  I learned the hard way that modern dance is a whole lotta work!  Only in the past 9 years (living 2 blocks from 314 acres of fabulous City Park) have I learned both the joy and spiritual awakening available in physical activity – dare I say exercise?!

Today, I refill my energy cup by walking in the park, riding my bike on errands, skiing in the winter and practicing yoga once a week.  I can’t imagine my life without this physical nourishment, yet I do remember telling people, “I’m just not a physical person.”  Of course, now I know better.  We are all physical people!  And, there are an infinite number of recipes for energizing ourselves through physical activity.

What physical activities support your spiritual awakening, call you to feel more alive? 

Do you get energized from “hard work” like chopping wood or making things?  Does your energy come from physical challenges like training for a marathon or swimming across the English channel?  Do you feel energized playing a team sport?



I knew from a very early age that a good bit of my spiritual awakening came from solitude.  When I was five, I spent hours pulling the seeds from the four-o-clock flowers in our yard to later sell to our neighbors.  I spent many summer hours laying under a tree reading books.  As the oldest of five children, I cherished any quiet time alone!

Today, I am energized by and experience spiritual awakening when skiing alone, taking solo retreat in the desert, walking in silence, reading for many hours and making jewelry.

What type of solitude facilitates your spiritual awakening?

Do you get energized by camping and fishing alone?  Do you feel recharged when you chop vegetables for lunch or fold laundry after dinner?  Do you feel most alive deep sea diving?



I’m much more of a one-on-one person than a group person.  And yet, I experienced a profound spiritual awakening at an Obama rally three days before he became president.  I’ve also felt energized by taking a strong stand on a neighborhood zoning issue.  I love the energy and spiritual awakening every time I go to church at Agape.  And, I give and receive so much energy in the tiny community of two with my best friend, Tama.

What aspects of community, what particular communities energize you, spiritually enrich you?

Do you feel a spiritual awakening when you volunteer your time with children or the homeless?  Do you get energized by leading your work group?  Do you feel more alive when you sing in your church choir?



I’ve had a love of “home” ever since nine years of age. I masterminded, and built with my sisters, a two-story, three-room fort – complete with carpet, screened and curtained windows and a safe . . . for snacks, of course.  Today, I am tickled pink that my 8-year-old-niece, Hailey, loves HGTV!  I get energized doing almost anything in my home.  And, just watching Hailey’s enthusiasm watching home design shows makes me feel more alive!

I’ve collected rocks since I was ten.  Still today, every time I visit the desert, I bring a few new rock friends home with me.  I feel Spirit in those rocks!

I can’t get enough of soul music.  I’m constantly on the lookout for new artists – one of the reasons I love attending church at Agape – even though it’s 1,000 miles from my home!  Listening to Rickie Byars Beckwith, Aaron Neville or Niki Haris sing from the bottom of their hearts facilitates a spiritual awakening in me so beautifully!

What interests or passions give you more energy, call to your heart, cause your spiritual awakening?

Ice fishing?  Restoring vintage Mustangs?  Riding your horses?  Inventing video games?  Sky diving?  Gardening?  Sail boating?  Remodeling houses?  Cooking for dinner parties?


Your unique recipe for energizing you . . .

Take the time to observe yourself – noticing when you feel most alive, when you are strengthened and give yourself – and the world – the huge gift of allowing yourself to spend more time engaged in the activities that cause you to feel more alive!

Here’s to our spiritual awakening . . .

I’d love to hear what you’re noticing!


Join a small group of like-minded coaches to spend 90 days discovering and implementing your way in the Thriving in 90 Days! program.  Begins Sept 24th.