What Are These Weird Times Calling You To?

In addition to natural disasters, racial and political unrest and mass shooting tragedy, many of my clients and friends are also experiencing weird, challenging and unsettling personal circumstances.

I’m no exception. I’m experiencing unrest in my business, with my mother and in my health. I’ve found that I’ve had to become disciplined about increasing my meditation practice, exercise, spending time alone in nature, speaking kindly to myself and asking for help.

What Are These Weird Times Calling You To?
Focusing on the beauty of the mud pattern in the arroyo

And then it occurred to me: maybe that’s what I’m being called to.

So what do I want to focus on? All of the weirdness and challenges or the opportunity to spend more time with my God, my body, the great outdoors and my loved ones who’re helping me?

So what about you? Does your life feel weird and uncomfortable right now? What might be calling you?

As always, post your comments, experiences and insights below . . .

Which of Your Friends Are Experiencing Loss and Grief?

It can be hard to know how to support someone through grief.  And, when you do offer support, it makes a HUGE difference to that person to know you care.

I’ve got two excellent resources here for you to share with them.

Which of Your Friends Are Experiencing Loss and Grief?

1. A comprehensive, super-helpful article, written by three compassionate mental health professionals:
Coping with Grief and Loss
Understanding the Grieving Process and Learning to Heal
By Melinda Smith, M.A., Lawrence Robinson, and Jeanne Segal, Ph.D.

It’s a bit long. And, it can easily be read in small chunks.

Click here to access article.

2. If your friend runs their own business, a Good Grief, Business Back on Track Clarity session with me – no cost, my gift.
I will help them get clear about receiving the good in grief which will point them toward how to keep their business running smoothly during this challenging time.

If they want further support from me, we can talk about that, too. If not, that’s totally cool also.

Click to schedule a session.

As always, post your comments, experiences and insights below…

This Will Make You Get Your Business Back on Track Now

If you don’t get your business running smoothly, which is worse, you not making the unique contribution you are here to make or your potential clients not getting the value of your unique contribution? Who wants to have to answer that question?!?

So here’s the thing.

When you can articulate with crystal clarity WHY you do what you do, your WHY will push, pull and drag you to resolve whatever’s in the way of your thriving business.

My WHY:
Inspiring and urging us to freedom
from our innocently self-created prisons
so that we may be more fully ourselves
and make our unique contributions to the planet.

Many of our self-created prisons were innocently created at a time of unresolved loss. Sometime when we were super young and felt abandoned, unloved or worthless. Other times, later in life around a break-up or a death.

If you’ve experienced a recent break-up, death or loss, that certainly doesn’t mean it’s unresolved. You’re grieving and have the opportunity even in the grief to find the good.

So what about you? Do you know, absolutely know, your business can be more, serve more?

If so, I’d love to offer you a Business Back on Track breakthrough session. There’s no charge for this session ~ it’s my gift. Click here now to book and apply.

We’ll get on the phone for 45 – 60 minutes and specifically look at where you are now and where you’d like to be.

If I feel you might be a great candidate for my brand new 10-week Business Back on Track by Receiving the Gift of Loss program, we can talk about that at the end of your session.

This Will Make You Get Your Business Back on Track Now

Because it isn’t for everyone.

I help business owners who:

  • Do extraordinary work, providing a needed service.
  • Approach life and work in a light, playful, open and deep way, even through broken-heartedness.
  • Are decisive and committed to their own transformation and making the greatest contribution of their business, while using updated technology like eGoldFax providing e-faxing services for their enterprise.

If you believe it’s possible to find the genuine gifts in challenge and/or loss and allow them to transform you and your business, then book and apply to be considered for one of the Business Back on Track breakthrough session.

As always, post your comments and experiences below …

What Happens When We Don’t Censor Ourselves?

Are you watching AnnE with an “E” on Netflix?

If so, I’d love to hear how you’re loving it . . .

If not and you’d like your heart broken wide open in the best possible way, I highly recommend you stop reading this and start watching AnnE now.

She is so refreshingly, sometimes painfully, uncensored. She experiences life in it’s full spectrum, from the delectably scrumptious to her blunt observation of her own “ugliness.”

AnnENetflix400

Thirteen-year-old, AnnE quotes Jane Eyre, “If all the world hated you, and believed you wicked, while your own conscience approved you, and absolved you from guilt, you would not be without friends.”

Self-love 101. WOW.

I’ve watched 3 episodes and felt more alive and cried with every one. If you haven’t already, give yourself this gift.

Makes me want to add an E to my name.

As always, post your comments and experiences below…

If you’re a coach or consultant experiencing loss or turmoil, then join my new, private, free FB Group, Good Grief for hope around receiving the good in grief and support for getting your business back on track.

Are You Struggling to Find the Genuine Gift in Grief?

Last year my client, “Dianne,” felt optimistic and hopeful that her daughter-in-law Serena could take over her business when she retired. They’d been moving in that direction for a few months when she realized she’d been looking the other way about how much Serena seemed to be drinking.

When Serena had an altercation with one of Dianne’s key employees, she could no longer avoid the inevitable. She had to let Serena go. Dianne’s son, Tate, quit speaking to her and they wouldn’t allow her to spend time with her grandchildren.

Inconsolable for awhile, Dianne chose to coach with me because she knew she needed to get past feeling betrayed and wanted to be available to the business and her other children and grandchildren.

Today she’ll be the first to tell you she’s less judgmental. She prays for her son and daughter-in-law and their kids every day because she realizes it’s out of her hands. She’s re-energized about her work and is grooming one of her long-time employees to buy the business.

~ ~ ~ ~ ~

Four years ago, three days after I sold my house to live happily ever after with my boyfriend, we got into a physical fight. That had never happened. Stunned, bruised and broken-hearted, I stayed at a friend’s house and tried to get to the bottom of it with him.

We weren’t able to work it out between us. I found an apartment and began my own inner work. Over the next several months, I realized I had taken a stand for myself that day. I had been putting off my dream of living in New Mexico, waiting for him to be ready. Not the most elegant way to free myself from my self-created prison, but free myself I did.

It’s almost 3 years since I moved to New Mexico. After the first year of living here, my sister told me maybe I should change the recording on my voicemail that says, “You’ve reached my new home and office in beautiful, spacious Lamy, New Mexico . . .” I haven’t change it yet because every day here feels like a huge gift for my body, mind, heart and soul.

Are You Struggling to Find the Genuine Gift in Grief?
Beautiful, spacious Lamy, New Mexico

Why do I tell you all this?

If I hadn’t insisted on finding the gifts in all that grief, I would’ve remained broken and become bitter.

If Dianne hadn’t done the work in coaching, she would have remained a judgmental victim and allowed her business to fall apart.

So, what about you?

If you’ve experienced the loss of a dream, a business or personal relationship or of a loved one to death recently, would you be willing to consider finding the gifts in grief?

May all beings receive the transformative gifts of grief.

As always, post your comments and experiences below …

A Peek into a Private Conversation about Self-Love

Today, I have the honor of sharing with you a private email conversation between me and one of my courageous clients, Hailey, (with her express permission, of course), exploring a bit about self-love.

“Ann, I’m sitting in my room with the window open listening to Nina Simone covers, feeling everything so deeply…

I’ve been wanting to touch more on the topic of self-love with you {my favorite 🙂 }.

If you feel comfortable sharing, may I ask what your road to self-love was like? I understand it’s an ongoing practice that we all must work to maintain. And, was there a moment in particular when you allowed yourself to step more into self-love and move away from harsh self-criticism/self-hatred?

Because, I often wonder if my self-consciousness and lack of self-acceptance will ever go away. I guess it really comes down to feeling peace in/with oneself.

When did you get to the point where you felt peaceful in who/what you are? I know each of us is on our own journey but I feel like it would be wonderful to hear your experience with this topic.”

A Peek into a Private Conversation about Self-Love

“Hi Hailey,

I’m happy to answer you and I don’t think there was one big ah-ha moment. Three thing I do know:

1. Coaching, talking deeply, to my niece Alisha for the past 16 years, since she was 11 (and I was 40) has really soften me toward myself. Sort of like I became aware of how much I wanted to support her in loving self-talk, so I had to do it for me, too.

2. When I was 34, my boyfriend died of a drug overdose before we could find help. I had to get really clear on why I chose to keep living. At that time, I realized it was about love. He was the most purely loving person I’ve ever known and I committed to honoring him by being more loving myself. And that started with me – loving me more unconditionally.

In a way, at that time, it was sort of easy because with so much grief, my defenses were down.

3. I really took to heart that thing about putting my own oxygen mask first (on the plane) before I try to help anyone else. If I wasn’t going to love and take care of myself, who would?

What might you hear in all of this for you?

Love, Ann”

“Oh Ann, THANK YOU. This is beautiful. I’m grateful for you sharing all of this with me. Truly, it means a lot to me.

I am hearing SO many things in all of this; I mostly asked the question because I sometimes wonder if it’s even totally POSSIBLE to love oneself and thus be in flow. I’m hearing that life can be full of suffering in one moment and full of beauty and magic in another moment. I’m hearing proof of the human condition!

I also hear that pain softens you. I totally understand this. It’s almost as if pain breaks you open in a way that allows for the possibility of more love to flow in. At least that can be the case sometimes.

I’m hearing that perhaps there is no correct path to the “enlightenment” I’m looking for, aka total self-acceptance. I’m hearing that it’s mostly about choice – do I choose to accept myself in THIS MOMENT or do I not? It’s simply a yes or no question.

I’m remembering a conversation we had where you mentioned that sometimes you don’t even need your coach to answer questions because you’re able to answer them yourself just by asking the question in the coaching space.

I feel that way in this situation. I know what to do and I suppose I was just looking for an affirmation in another person’s experience other than mine. Because, like I said, sometimes I feel so much resistance to myself and the way things are that I doubt life will ever be truly peaceful. I understand now that life’s one moment at a time.

Thank you for reflecting on this with me Ann.”

So, what about you? What do you hear in this for you?

What Are the Many Triggers of Grief?

Grief arises from any event or new condition that shatters
the foundation you previously knew as your reality.
goldenwillowretreat.com

Very few of us embrace grief as part of living. We tend to reserve the idea of grieving for something we do after someone has died. And we don’t want to do that for very long or talk about it much at all.

We do ourselves a huge disservice by keeping grief in the shadows.

When we recognize the loss in the death of a loved one, a diminished savings account, grown children moving to another state or a health diagnosis, we give ourselves the opportunity to feel what we’re feeling and allow a new identity to emerge.

What losses have you experienced that demanded a new you?

What Are the Many Triggers of Grief?

Most of us tend to not want a new identity. Yet our former identity is no longer available.

If we don’t take the conscious journey of grieving, we tend to numb ourselves, sometimes to the point of barely living.

If we do take the conscious journey of grieving, we give ourselves the opportunity to embrace more of who we truly are and perhaps even serve others in a whole new way.

Ironically, consciously grieving gifts us with more authentic, joyful living.

If you’ve read this far, I would love you to share something in the comments. Let’s move grief out of the shadows . . .

(Excerpted from my forthcoming book, “Strong from Within: Simple perceptions and practices for transforming stress and overwhelm into clarity and purpose”)