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Shifting the Focus from Anxiety to Opportunity

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In every crisis there is danger and opportunity.

Recently I realized that I was more focused on the danger and perceived danger of this world crisis. I know you, too, might be feeling anxious and not sure of how to proceed – in your life or in your business.

I’d like to share a super cool tool with you. Thank goodness that as a coach, I have powerful tools to shift my perspective. One of my favorites is the Perspective Pie. Wanna play?

Okay, pull out a blank sheet of paper and draw a circle, filling the page with that big circle as much as you can. Then divide your circle into 8 slices of pie.

In one of those slices, write your current perspective. Mine was something like, “No one can focus on or afford coaching right now.” Then in the next slice, write a slightly better perspective. “Well I’m still working with clients. Some people still want coaching.”

Then write another somewhat better perspective. And better, and better and better until all 8 slices have new perspectives. My final slice was, “Coaching helps people uncover their opportunities. I need to be of more service now.”

So, I’d love to offer you a gift coaching session to help you uncover your current opportunities. We can focus on your life, your business or both.

Click here to access my calendar to schedule.

Are You Struggling to Find the Genuine Gift in Grief?

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Last year my client, “Dianne,” felt optimistic and hopeful that her daughter-in-law Serena could take over her business when she retired. They’d been moving in that direction for a few months when she realized she’d been looking the other way about how much Serena seemed to be drinking.

When Serena had an altercation with one of Dianne’s key employees, she could no longer avoid the inevitable. She had to let Serena go. Dianne’s son, Tate, quit speaking to her and they wouldn’t allow her to spend time with her grandchildren.

Inconsolable for awhile, Dianne chose to coach with me because she knew she needed to get past feeling betrayed and wanted to be available to the business and her other children and grandchildren.

Today she’ll be the first to tell you she’s less judgmental. She prays for her son and daughter-in-law and their kids every day because she realizes it’s out of her hands. She’s re-energized about her work and is grooming one of her long-time employees to buy the business.

~ ~ ~ ~ ~

Four years ago, three days after I sold my house to live happily ever after with my boyfriend, we got into a physical fight. That had never happened. Stunned, bruised and broken-hearted, I stayed at a friend’s house and tried to get to the bottom of it with him.

We weren’t able to work it out between us. I found an apartment and began my own inner work. Over the next several months, I realized I had taken a stand for myself that day. I had been putting off my dream of living in New Mexico, waiting for him to be ready. Not the most elegant way to free myself from my self-created prison, but free myself I did.

It’s almost 3 years since I moved to New Mexico. After the first year of living here, my sister told me maybe I should change the recording on my voicemail that says, “You’ve reached my new home and office in beautiful, spacious Lamy, New Mexico . . .” I haven’t change it yet because every day here feels like a huge gift for my body, mind, heart and soul.

Are You Struggling to Find the Genuine Gift in Grief?
Beautiful, spacious Lamy, New Mexico

Why do I tell you all this?

If I hadn’t insisted on finding the gifts in all that grief, I would’ve remained broken and become bitter.

If Dianne hadn’t done the work in coaching, she would have remained a judgmental victim and allowed her business to fall apart.

So, what about you?

If you’ve experienced the loss of a dream, a business or personal relationship or of a loved one to death recently, would you be willing to consider finding the gifts in grief?

May all beings receive the transformative gifts of grief.

As always, post your comments and experiences below …

Our YES to Rebirth

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I tend to be a bit slow to embrace change so I’ve been clinging to an old life for more than a year.  It’s been time to leave the romantic relationship I ended a year ago, deepen the nature of my coaching work and move to a quiet, spacious place (with far fewer people) where I could feel home.

So change has embraced me.  Well, maybe more like wrestled me into submission!

Just last week, I shared with you that every time for the past two months that I looked at a wonderful home in New Mexico, it would then vaporize.  So, I loosened my grip on the idea that it had to happen now.  Which, of course, gave some space for it to happen now.

I am SOOOO excited to share with you that I am moving to a beautiful, light-filled casita in Lamy, New Mexico (20 minutes southeast of Santa Fe) in about 17 days. (But who’s counting?!?)

New Mexico

One of the many views from the portal of
my new Zen Casita!

Which gave me the courage to finally face what has been going on with me that wasn’t allowing me to cleanly end the relationship.  And I freed myself. 

Which then gave me the courage to begin birthing an intimate, weekend Next Chapter Women’s Retreat – in gorgeous Lamy, of course!  Stay tuned for details . . .

What about you?  What in your old life is dying in order for you to say “Yes” to rebirth?

Post your comments, insights and progress below.

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My book, “Thriving Work” is now available
on Kindle at Amazon for just $3.99:
Click here to order

 

What’s Yearning to Be Discovered?

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Happy gorgeous autumn!

I adore this time of year. When the light becomes more clear and the mornings and evenings are cooler, my mind slows down a bit.  Almost instinctively, I reflect more in the mornings.  It’s as if my psyche begins to take stock of what is in the storehouse and root cellar.

This year my focus has turned to New Mexico, the home of my soul.  I lived north of Taos for two years in 1999 and 2000.  It was a magical time.  I fell in love with the land and the sky and the sage and the rocks.  And the spaciousness . . .  And the light and the moon and the sun.  I moved back to Denver as I was separating from my then-husband and needed to reinvigorate my business.

New Mexico landscape
The Rio Grande River just south of Taos,
as the season is turning to autumn.

It feels like it is time to live there again.  I have been looking at places since the beginning of August and wonderful casitas keep calling me and then their owners rent to someone else.  I finally took that as a sign that maybe now wasn’t the time.

And then I got another nudge. So I am going down to Lamy, NM (20 minutes northeast of Santa Fe) to look at another beautiful casita.  Once again I am excited to see what I will discover!

I’ll keep you posted.

In the meantime, what about you?  What is yearning to be discovered in your gorgeous autumn?

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Strong from Within . . .

If you are feeling called to go beyond some of your seeming limitations and would like coaching support, let’s have a conversation to explore if the one-on-one Strong from Within coaching program would be a good fit for you.

If it fits for you, we will do some of the coaching sitting on a wonderful New Mexico porch!

Porch in New Mexico

Ah, the transformative coaching we will do
on a porch like this!

Click here to schedule your conversation.

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My book, “Thriving Work” is now available
on Kindle at Amazon for just $3.99:
Click here to order

 

What Might Our Lives Look Like If We Refused to Align with Limitations?

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We either make ourselves miserable or we make ourselves strong.  The amount of work is the same.” – Carlos Castaneda

What might our lives look like if we noticed our misery and then consciously chose to move toward our strength?

What if, in those tough moments, we remembered that we are Infinite beings and we refused to align with what we perceive as limitations?

One of my young adult clients gave up smoking this week.  He told me he didn’t want to smoke anymore because he wanted to focus on more important things.  When I asked him about those important things, he told me he wanted to “smell good for girls and having more time to study instead of going outside all the time for a smoke break.”

How great is that?!?  He can either use the same time for a smoke break or to study for school.

So, what about you?  Where in you life might you like to refuse to align with your limitations and make yourself strong?

Post your comments, insights and progress below.

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Strong from Within . . .

If you are feeling called to go beyond some
limitations and would like coaching support,
let’s have a conversation to explore if the
one-on-one Strong from Within coaching
program would be a good fit for you.

Click here to schedule your conversation.

==========================

My book, “Thriving Work” is now available
on Kindle at Amazon for just $3.99:
Click here to order

 

StrengthsFinder™: Good to Great Enough

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When does going for Excellence become a burden?  All strengths have their dark side.  The strength of Maximizer is no exception.  I know this one from the inside, as it is my own number one StrengthsFinder™ strength.  And, of course, I have served as a great match for dozens of clients over the years with Maximizer in their top 5.

Maximizer suffers no fools.  Not even ourselves. 

Recently one of my clients with Maximizer in her top 5 dug in her heels.  For several months we had been doing strengths coaching with her leadership team of four.  When it was time to bring strengths training to the rest of the staff in her small business, she asked, “Why should we do this?  How do we know it will work with them?”

She caught me by surprise.  She loves StrengthsFinder.  It was her idea to bring it to the company.  What was going on?

When I had a one-on-one conversation with her, it became clear that her Maximizer had been triggered.  Sure we had seen greater engagement and more distribution of the workload based on strengths with the leadership team, but how did we know that would carry through to the rest of the team?

She knew that what we were doing was good, but would it continue with the team and become great?  When Maximizer goes to the dark side, the translation of “great” equals perfect.  Managing the trigger requires dialing “perfect” back to great enough.

rainbow

It would be so easy for my own Maximizer to
wish that the second rainbow were as vibrant
as the first.  Or, that I could have taken a
picture of both rainbows all the way across. 
Instead, I call upon my Connectedness and
Positivity strengths and feel happy that I am
connected to nature in this way and grateful
that I did capture the moment in a meaningful
and beautiful way!

By calling on her strengths of Responsibility (to her team and to her original commitment of becoming a strengths-based company) and her strength of Self-Assurance (confidence and trust in her original decision), we are once again moving forward – toward this amazing destination called “great enough.”

What about you?  If you know your StrengthsFinder strengths, when have you noticed one of your strengths being triggered?  How did you get back to making your contribution?

Post your comments, insights and progress below.

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If you haven’t yet taken the StrengthsFinder™ assessment, I highly recommend it!

It costs $19.99 and takes 30 – 40 minutes to complete.
They will immediately email you your top 5 strengths and a report about them. 

I would love to know your to 5 strengths, if you’d like to share them with me!

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Strong from Within . . .

If you are feeling called to go deeper with your strengths at home or at work, let’s have a conversation to explore if the one-on-one Strong from Within coaching program would be a good fit for you.

Click here to schedule your conversation.

==========================

My book, “Thriving Work” is now available
on Kindle at Amazon for just $3.99:
Click here to order

Creator/Owner Mindset: Naming the Glory of You

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A few years ago, my coach at the time, Jeff Patterson, created an important distinction for himself to support him in expressing himself and his fullest contribution.  He gave names to himself at the far ends of the spectrum of low expression and contribution and high expression and contribution. 

Needy Man and Miracle Man.

He knew exactly what each meant to him and he kept his focus on living his days as Miracle Man and having compassion for himself when he showed up as Needy Man. 

Jeff was an amazing role model for me.  Being coached by Miracle Man called forth more from me than I knew was within me.  Learning how Jeff worked with Needy Man taught me to love myself more, no matter what.  And yet, in all the time I worked with him, I couldn’t come up with my two distinct names for me.  I knew that my equivalent of Needy Man was Scramblin’ Ann but my Miracle Man equivalent eluded me.

The more I tried to find my glorious name, the more I could feel my mind “searching my brain’s hard drive” rather than receiving it from my heart.  So I let it go and wrote my first book with Jeff’s coaching support.

I coached several clients to name theirs.  I told them about Jeff’s success and disclosed that I had only half my equation, yet I could feel the power of having both names. 

Melancholy Monica and Magnificent Monica. 
(Names of clients have been changed for their privacy.)
Scardy Cat and Lover Girl.
Contracted Shelly and Expansive Shelly.
Barely Betsy and Goddess Elizabeth.
Slave and Queen . . .

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Ah, the feeling of experiencing myself
as Radiant Grace . . .

And just a few days ago, out of the blue, I received a gift from my heart: Radiant Grace.  How amazing is that – the name Ann means grace.

Scramblin’ Ann and Radiant Grace.  Oh my goodness, can I feel the difference in my body, my energy and my heart!!!

What about you?  What distinctions bubble up for you?!?

Post your comments, insights and progress below.

– – – – – – – – – –

On the Way to Experiencing the Divine . . .

If you are feeling disoriented or lost and sense you are being called to a deeper relationship with the Divine, let’s have a conversation to explore if the one-on-one Align with Source coaching program would be a good fit for you.

– – – – – – – – – –

How Might Whole Use of Empathy Look?

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Earlier this week, I passed my oral exam and officially became a Certified Strengths Strategy Coach!  I’ve never been certified in anything before. So this is significant because of how strongly I believe in the value of going deeper with the Gallup StrengthsFinder™ assessment.

While all 34 strengths are created equal, a few seem to create more havoc AND, when used at an optimal “volume” create extraordinary outcomes. 

Empathy tops that list.  I know this one from personal experience – Empathy is my 2nd strength and in the top 5 for dozens of my clients, friends and colleagues.

flowers in a field

My Empathy loves feeling these sunflowers
and evergreens in the mist!

 

And what I’ve noticed over the years:  whole use of Empathy, optimal volume of Empathy, involves two things: mindfulness and boundaries with Empathy for those around us and a practice of Empathy for ourselves.

Mindfulness and Boundaries with Empathy
for Those around Us
From sheer necessity, I made a deal with Spirit a few years ago:  If it is optimal, I will feel it.  If it isn’t, I won’t.  It took me awhile to come to this specific boundary because I wrestled with optimal for whom.  Eventually my 3rd strength, Connectedness, kicked in to remind me: for all.  Now, when I do feel someone else’s pain, excitement, grief – whatever it is – I often name it or ask about it.  Which then tends to open up life-affirming conversations because that person feels so seen.

Mindfulness and boundaries show up in many different forms.  One of my clients is vigilant about visualizing an energy bubble around herself at all times.  She still feels others, but their feelings don’t come into her own energy field and deplete her.  Another uses her strength of Adaptability to moderate Empathy.  One of my friends believes Empathy is one of his greatest gifts and only occasionally feels the need to take time for himself to re-energize.  I consider him a bit of a saint!

A Practice of Empathy for Ourselves
One of the most powerful and overlooked practices with any and all of our strengths involves using them toward ourselves, in relationship with ourselves.  This tends to be a brand new concept for most of us.

Wow!  Look at all of that untapped potential in the most important relationship of our lives – the one with ourselves.  How different is my experience of my own life when I give myself the gift of Empathy within?!?

This one idea has changed the course of my life.  As I have become more compassionate and less judgmental with myself, I have lessened my internal struggle.  As I have paid attention to how I feel, I have less of a need for others to understand how I feel.  And, I’m better able to communicate my feelings and needs in a way that my loved ones can hear!

What about you?  If Empathy is in your top 5 StrengthsFinder™ strengths, how might you play with it a bit? Even if it isn’t in your top 5 or you haven’t taken the StrengthsFinder asessment, what do you notice about Empathy for you?

Post your comments, insights and progress below.

If you haven’t yet taken the StrengthsFinder™ assessment, I highly recommend it!

It costs $19.99 and takes 30 – 40 minutes to complete.

They will immediately email you your top 5 strengths and a report about them.

I would love to know your to 5 strengths, if you’d like to share them with me!

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Feeling Disoriented or Lost?

If you are feeling disoriented or lost and sense you are being called to a deeper relationship with the Divine, let’s have a conversation to explore if the one-on-one Align with Source coaching program would be a good fit for you.

==========================

My book, “Thriving Work” is now available
on Kindle at Amazon for just $3.99:
Click here to order

Mindfulness: Why Am I So Happy?

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In his new book, “The Millionaire Master Plan,” Roger Hamilton writes about his own practice for creating his day each morning.  He shares eight questions that he asks and answers himself every morning.

I have been playing with his questions.

My favorite, by far:
Why Am I So Happy?

This question presses me to find my happiness and gives me infinite opportunities to name it.  I’ve also noticed that I am becoming more aware of happiness as my natural, innate state, even when I temporarily feel unhappy about something.

081514BlogPost

How could I be anything but happy as
I stare into the face of this pure Beauty?

How great is that?!?

What about you?  In this moment, why are you so happy?

Post your comments, insights and progress below.

Thank you for playing with me today!

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Align with Source coaching

If you are ready to start a business, go to the next level with your business, change careers or radically transform your life, let’s have a conversation to explore if the one-year, one-on-one Align with Source coaching program would be a good fit for you.

==========================

My book, “Thriving Work” is now available
on Kindle at Amazon for just $3.99:
Click here to order

Find Your Strongest Life: Singing Me to Her

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I remember a line from a song in the Dances of Universal Peace, “Mother Earth God, she is calling me . . .” and a line from the movie, Australia, “I will sing you to me.”

Image1 300x225

What would it take for me to hear Her song more?

Well, the New Mexico land sings me to Her.  Recently, I’ve heard the song for a while and wasn’t finding time in my schedule to answer her call.  So She spontaneously cleared my schedule for a few days!

I just got back from Taos two nights ago.

What I noticed being there: she sings me to Her because I am a stronger version of me when I’m there.  I am in tune with myself, the natural rhythm of my life and of Life itself.  I am aligned with both my spiritual Self and my human self.  Whole.  Needing nothing.  Being.  Present.  Breathing deeper.  And taking in the incredible nurturance of the Earth herself.

Ah . . . . . . . . . .

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Ah, the melodies of the trees, the clouds, the sky . . .

I lived there for two years in 1999 – 2000.  I get the sense that I will be living there again.  Maybe sooner than I imagine.  Certainly, I will listen for and follow her song more . . .

What about you?  What calls you?  What puts you in tune with yourself, the natural rhythm of your life and of Life itself?  What aligns you with both your spiritual Self and your human self?

Image3 300x300

The path home . . .

Post your comments, insights and progress below.

Thank you for playing with me today!

==========================

Align with Source coaching

If you are ready to start a business, go to the next level with your business, change careers or radically transform your life, let’s have a conversation to explore if the one-year, one-on-one Align with Source coaching program would be a good fit for you.

==========================

My book, “Thriving Work” is now available
on Kindle at Amazon for just $3.99:
Click here to order