Self-Awareness

What Good Life Is Just Beyond Acceptance?

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Earlier this week, I drove to Denver to facilitate a StrengthsFinder team development for one of my coaching clients. As is want to do this time of year, it was snowing and the roads were icy for about the first 45 minutes of my drive.

I could hear the typical conversation in my head about how it would be fine for me to drive in the snow if it weren’t for all the other pesky drivers. And, perhaps because I had only myself to talk to, I reminded myself that the experience of my life is created from within me, not by external circumstances outside of me (those pesky drivers).

So, I decided to accept the other drivers and drove for a few minutes without saying much to myself. And, then I had an insight.

What if I put my focus on my relationship with the road? What if I noticed that I am One with the whole experience – the road, the snow, the other drivers? What if I allowed myself to receive the beauty of the experience?

Instantly my experience shifted from one of stress and tolerating to feeling relaxed and knowing I am always supported. I had a palpable experience of the state of grace in which I live – if I only but notice.

On my drive back from Denver, I was present to the glory of this moment with the majesty of the Spanish Peaks near Walsenburg, Colorado.
On my drive back from Denver, I was present to the glory of this moment with the majesty of the Spanish Peaks near Walsenburg, Colorado.

Maybe 15 minutes later, the traffic thinned and there was no longer snow and ice on the road. And, my awareness of receiving WHAT IS stayed with me throughout the rest of the trip.

(Excerpted from my forthcoming book, “Strong from Within: Simple perceptions and practices for returning to the joy of you”)

What Opens Your Heart to Joy?

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Recently, one of my coaching clients mentioned it was hard for her to keep her focus on what’s important to her. How often does that happen for all of us?

Especially at this time of year, it can be easy to slip into a whirlwind of activity or focusing on what’s missing.

If you’ve taken a moment to read this, take another moment to check in with yourself, become present to this holy moment and notice what opens your heart to joy. Allow yourself to be present with that in this moment.

Ann Strong Blog Post 122315

As I was writing this, I realized I wanted to run outside and photograph the beauty of this shortest day of the year. The clouds and the mountains and the snow – opening my heart to joy . . .

And this moment.

And this moment. What opens your heart to joy now in this moment?

Hmmmm, perhaps a wonderful way to live a life . . .

(Excerpted from my forthcoming book, “Strong from Within: Simple perceptions and practices for returning to the joy of you”)

What Is the Beauty of the Whole Human Experience?

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Thirty years ago, when I discovered the Power of Positive Thinking and a bit later that My Thoughts Create My Reality, I was thrilled. I felt like I had been given the keys to the kingdom. A simple success formula: think happy thoughts, have a happy life.

Yet, something seemed off and my life often wasn’t happy.

Over the years, I tried many versions of the formula. I wrote positive affirmations, read uplifting books, hired a coach to help me raise my vibration and attended Create Your Best Life webinars and seminars.

While they all seemed like good ideas, I could tell that something still didn’t fit for me. Without knowing what was missing, I moved on.

More accurately, I thought I had moved on. Four years ago, I wrote my first book, Thriving Work. With a subtitle of “A journey to your best self…” I see now that a journey to my best self abandons my “worst” self somewhere along the path.

The book includes 33 affirmative prayers. 27 of them are written from the power-of-positive-thinking perspective, 4 point toward being ourselves fully (all the “good” and “bad”) and 2 directly address including all of ourselves (“All of Me, None of Me” and “From the Fullness of You”).

When I wrote the book, I didn’t sort the prayers that way. I simply wrote what I knew at the time. All of the prayers have been wonderful companions on my life journey. And, they have uplifted and positively impacted many readers.

Only recently, did I come to realize the missing link.

We don’t always control our thinking. And, when we do temporarily manage to control our thinking, we cut off part of our human experience.

I love how Michael Neill describes this. “If we think we are meant to be in charge of what we think, we feel like victims of our own inadequacy, and that if we only tried harder/were more vigilant/had better techniques we would have everything we want and could always be happy and never angry, fearful, or sad.”

What Is the Beauty of the Whole Human Experience

Now that I am beginning to realize thoughts are like clouds, I allow them to be how and what they are, without taking them too seriously. I allow all of them, without trying to make them positive. And I consciously (as best I can in any moment) choose which ones to act on and which ones to allow to pass.

Without needing to control my thoughts, I’m relaxing more. I’m enjoying being human, without so much vigilance. When I notice my thoughts are less than positive, I remember I don’t need to be so concerned with the content of my thoughts.

I’m making less distinction about “good” and “bad.” I’ve spent so much of my life avoiding what I consider “bad,” and it’s been exhausting.

I’m becoming more and more aware that this moment is my life. When I am present in the moment (however “good,” “bad” or in-between), it is somehow wonderful regardless. Now that is the beauty of the whole human experience!

(Excerpted from my forthcoming book, “Strong from Within: Simple perceptions and practices for returning to the joy of you“)

The Best Way to Take a Stand for Your Contributions

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Last week, one of my colleagues told me that learning his top 5 StrengthsFinder strengths changed the trajectory of his life.

This after I had encouraged him to take the StrengthsFinder assessment when he had shared some frustrations about his job. Wow, he caught my attention, and I couldn’t wait to find out what he meant.

He told me that all of his life he had tried to bring new ideas and improvements to his jobs only to be told over and over again, “That’s not what we hired you for. Just do your job.”

His strengths indicate that his genius lies in sifting through many big ideas, projecting them into the future, choosing the ones that will make a huge impact and bringing those to fruition. We are talking about ideas on par with iPhone, Facebook or Uber. When his StrengthsFinder report echoed what he already knew about himself, he transformed in that moment.

“I have to start my own company. I am not going to let anyone hold me back anymore. I know I can make this happen.” In an instant, he went from feeling depressed and frustrated about being under-utilized to taking a stand for the huge contribution he is here to bring into reality.

It brought tears to my eyes. How would our experience of life shift if we each took a stand for ourselves and our unique strengths and contributions?!?

I’m on a mission.

Shidoni Sculpture Gardens in Teseque, NM

One of my greatest contributions based on my StrengthsFinder Strengths: seeing and calling forth your brilliance and your contributions. I spotted and captured this incredible contribution at the Shidoni Sculpture Gardens. Tesuque, NM.

If you already know your strengths and contributions, would you be willing to share them here to inspire others?

If you don’t yet know your top 5 StrengthsFinder strengths, would you be willing to love yourself and the world enough to invest $10 and 40 minutes to learn them so you can more confidently make the contributions that are only yours to make?!?

If so, click here to take the Gallup StrengthsFinder assessment.

Here’s to more awesome contributions to the planet!

(Excerpted from my forthcoming book, “Strong from Within: Simple perceptions and practices for returning to the joy of you”)

Post your strengths and contributions below . . .

Coming Back to Center

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Earlier this week, I attended an Evening of Exploration at the Academy for the Love of Learning. We explored Coming Back to Center – Embodied Leadership.

One of the most profound things I learned involved not always being able to tell if I was present within myself while being present with another person. What an amazing awareness . . .

How do I know when I am present with myself? What does it feel like? If I’m not in my own center, what does it take for me to become present in my own center?

I’m excited to share this piece with you – exploring this . . .

Experiencing being present with myself . . .

Experiencing being present with myself . . .


Home

Hello, is anybody home?

As I take a deep breath,
I check inside.

Can I feel myself here?
At home in my body?

I feel the energy of me
In my heart center.

I feel the edges
of my physical home
In the tips of my fingers
and the tips of my toes.

I feel my energetic presence
beyond my physical home.

As I feel out farther and farther,
I experience my Oneness
with my Big Home.

All that Is.

Ah, to be home
And to be Home.

(Excerpted from my forthcoming book, “Strong from Within.”)

I would love your thoughts and responses. Post comments and insights below . . .

What Deception Wants to Set You Free?

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The moon was at her fullest last night. According to astrologer Divine Harmony, the planet “Neptune is dominating the sky right now,” giving us the opportunity to discern where we have been deceiving ourselves.

The full moon working her magic over my home in Lamy, NM! June 2, 2015

The full moon working her magic over my home in Lamy, NM!
June 2, 2015

I normally wouldn’t write about astrology because it’s not in my realm, and I am writing about it now because it’s already had a profound impact on me. Thank you, Gina Garris, for sending me the blog post a couple of days ago. After I read it, I was moved to say a quick prayer, “Dear God, please show me where I have been deceiving myself.”

Then I forgot about it.

Yesterday, I was working with my business coach and he said something about there being a disconnect between my ability as a coach and my desire to coach more people. In a moment, I had an insight about where I had been deceiving myself since childhood, through three marriages and several other romantic relationships and how that all related to this disconnect in my business. And then I could feel the disconnect dissolve.

Well, my prayer had been answered in less than 24 hours. This is an issue I have been trying to resolve for 30 years!

So, I wanted you to have the same opportunity, if you would like . . .

And, stay tuned, in the next few weeks I will share more specifics about new coaching offerings and how perhaps I can serve you!

If you’d like to read Divine Harmony’s blog post about this full moon, visit her blog.

I would love your thoughts and responses. Post comments and insights below . . .

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My book, “Thriving Work” is now available
on Kindle at Amazon for just $3.99:
Click here to order

With Identity Shaken: Who am I?

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“Who am I?”

I’ve been asking myself that question a lot lately.

It’s been 8 months since I moved from Denver to Santa Fe and the shift in identity has been kicking my butt lately.

In the biggest, most cosmic sense, I am the unchanging and boundless radiant Light that I have always been and always will be.

In the personality, human sense, I’m judging myself for feeling less grounded and focused. I’ve noticed I’m starting to drive like I live in the country, without my aggressive city edge. I couldn’t decide if that was good or bad. And, then I got it: it just is. Neither good nor bad.

Do I really think I am how I drive?!?

The irony: Denver is my birth home and I moved to Santa Fe because New Mexico is my spiritual home.

Deep breath. Ah . . . my ego is having a tough time. Still wanting to control when my soul is letting go and surrendering.

Three of my clients are going through something similar. And none of them have moved. One is starting a business, another just began a romantic relationship when she had been sure she never wanted that again and the third formed a business partnership with a woman she adores and admires.

All of our changes are wonderful and positive, yet they shake up our identities, our egos. Ego doesn’t want to be shaken up.

I’ve found that remembering my True Identity really helps. I am not my ego, even if my ego is extremely committed to making me believe I am.

AStrongBlogpost052915
Ah, the challenge of being both Divine and human.
Gotta love Santa Fe art. Seen at the Shidoni Foundry
and Gallery in Tesuque, NM.

I leave you with this piece from my book:

All of Me, None of Me

Who I am is enough.

I allow my self-conscious,
limiting ideas
about myself
to drop away.

I accept and embrace my
fragile humanity
and my infinite Divinity.

I take myself lightly.

With bemusement and love,
I acknowledge my
quirks, inconsistencies and attachments.

With delight and love,
I acknowledge my powerful Presence.

I am. I am not.

I would love your thoughts and experiences.
Post comments and insights below . . .

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My book, “Thriving Work” is now available
on Kindle at Amazon for just $3.99:
Click here to order

How to Stay Out of Burnout as a Giver

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I’ve had some tendency toward giving to the point of resentment. And, some of my coaching clients have had tendencies to give to the point of depletion and depression.

So, I’ve had this inquiry for awhile: what does it take to give in a healthy way? When I’ve been in lower moods, it comes out something like: “if I give tons to everyone else, who will give to me?” Just the other day, I was shocked to actually receive an answer to that question asked in frustration.

Me. I will give to me.

Let me explain. Until that answer came, I believed there were givers and takers. And, they tended to pair up. What better for a taker than someone with lots to give?

Well, what if that whole model is only one way to look at it?

clouds

What do these glorious clouds have to share 
with us about vibrant living?

What if I live my life as a giver and I am one of the people I give to? Maybe I am the first person I give to (so that I’m giving from an overflowing cup)?

What might shift inside me so that I am not an energetic match for takers? What if my world view and focus is around giving? What if I am an energetic match for givers?

I do not yet know the answers to all these questions. I do love the questions! And, I do know that me giving to me instead of resentfully wondering who is going to give to me is definitely a wonderful way to live. And it’s a great way to avoid burnout and resentment.

I will report back to you as I know more. In the meantime, what about you? If you’ve noticed yourself depleting yourself by giving to everyone else, what have you done to avoid burnout?

Post your comments and insights below.

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My book, “Thriving Work” is now available
on Kindle at Amazon for just $3.99:
Click here to order

Creator/Owner Mindset: I Can’t Believe I Fell into this Hole

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There I was walking my talk. Like a great coach. And then I fell in that same hole – again.

Let me back up to the beginning.

I had been in a low mood for a day and a half. For a couple of weeks before that, I had made several invitations to people I would love to coach. All of them had said “no.”

I then attributed my low mood to “nobody wanting coaching.” That’s the moment I fell in the hole. But I didn’t realize it at the time.

low mood; falling into a hole

My mood got lower and lower. I felt disoriented and couldn’t focus. Talking with my own coach barely helped. That’s when I knew something was way off, but I still had no idea what it was.

I looked for reasons that my mood was going lower and lower. I knew better than that. I knew that the best way to deal with a low mood involves being graceful with myself and allowing it to pass. I knew better than to engage with it.

I knew better than second-guessing why I got a bunch of “no’s.” I know that no means “next.” In this particular time, I had a bit of amnesia – forgetting all that I know from selling my entire life.

Bless my coach. She was not going to leave me in this place. She sent me a snippet of a video that reminded me about my own power in my ability to choose and my ability to believe.

I immediately, beam-me-up-Scotty style, ascended from that hole. I had given away my power to choose and my power to believe. I flew out of the hole when I realized I could choose and believe again with that very breath.

Oh my God, how can I more consistently remember that I write the story of my life? I’m not in charge of when others say “yes” or “no.” I am in charge of remembering that my life is created from what I think about my life, not what happens “out there.”

Thank goodness for this profession of coaching. A sane, firm, persistent and loving voice when in a moment, I’d gone a bit off the rails . . .

What about you? How do you bring yourself back to remembering the truth of who you are when you forget a little bit?

I’d love to hear from you.

Post your comments and insights below.

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My book, “Thriving Work” is now available
on Kindle at Amazon for just $3.99:
Click here to order

Creator/Owner Mindset: ‘Why Is It Hard for Me to Put Myself Out There?’

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“Why is it so hard for me to put myself out there? I don’t feel insecure, but I guess I also don’t feel confident.”

Recently this was the coaching session agenda of one of my clients who is a new coach. He already has several clients and serves them beautifully. And his inquiry is almost universal. Even with gifted and experienced coaches, healers, artists, professionals.

This particular kind of question tends to lead us quite quickly to something like, “What’s wrong with me?” Since that kind of inquiry doesn’t tend to be helpful, let’s replace it with a much more empowering focus and question. Whenever I notice I am feeling self-conscious in my work, I use that as my cue to shift my focus off of me and onto the client.

woman friends chatting
What happens when we take our focus off ourselves
and put our full attention on the person in front of us?

I have my own daily morning practice around self-love, self-acceptance, self-attention, self-honoring, self-appreciation and self-allowing. I spend time being with myself no matter how I’m feeling or what I am thinking. Therefore, when I’m working, I know that I am already taken care of and now it is time to put my full attention on the person in front of me.

So, we shift our focus off of ourselves and onto the client. Our new, more empowering question can then sound something like, “How can I fully serve this person in front of me right now?”

We often tend to equate “putting ourselves out there” with marketing or sales. Then, we tend to make marketing and sales way different than working with our clients.

What if there was no difference? What if marketing and sales is literally the same as working with our clients?

Let’s look at that a bit more closely.

What if we approached “putting ourselves out there” exactly the same way as serving a paying client? What if we had the same fierce devotion and attention that we have for our clients for our website visitors, our audiences, our readers, our FB friends, our Twitter followers, the person next to us at a networking event?

How might our self-consciousness around “putting ourselves out there” transform?

I would love to hear your story!

Post your comments and insights below.

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My book, “Thriving Work” is now available
on Kindle at Amazon for just $3.99:
Click here to order