Creator/Owner Mindset: 'Why Is It Hard for Me to Put Myself Out There?'

“Why is it so hard for me to put myself out there? I don’t feel insecure, but I guess I also don’t feel confident.”

Recently this was the coaching session agenda of one of my clients who is a new coach. He already has several clients and serves them beautifully. And his inquiry is almost universal. Even with gifted and experienced coaches, healers, artists, professionals.

This particular kind of question tends to lead us quite quickly to something like, “What’s wrong with me?” Since that kind of inquiry doesn’t tend to be helpful, let’s replace it with a much more empowering focus and question. Whenever I notice I am feeling self-conscious in my work, I use that as my cue to shift my focus off of me and onto the client.

woman friends chatting
What happens when we take our focus off ourselves
and put our full attention on the person in front of us?

I have my own daily morning practice around self-love, self-acceptance, self-attention, self-honoring, self-appreciation and self-allowing. I spend time being with myself no matter how I’m feeling or what I am thinking. Therefore, when I’m working, I know that I am already taken care of and now it is time to put my full attention on the person in front of me.

So, we shift our focus off of ourselves and onto the client. Our new, more empowering question can then sound something like, “How can I fully serve this person in front of me right now?”

We often tend to equate “putting ourselves out there” with marketing or sales. Then, we tend to make marketing and sales way different than working with our clients.

What if there was no difference? What if marketing and sales is literally the same as working with our clients?

Let’s look at that a bit more closely.

What if we approached “putting ourselves out there” exactly the same way as serving a paying client? What if we had the same fierce devotion and attention that we have for our clients for our website visitors, our audiences, our readers, our FB friends, our Twitter followers, the person next to us at a networking event?

How might our self-consciousness around “putting ourselves out there” transform?

I would love to hear your story!

Post your comments and insights below.

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Ann Strong, founder of Strong from Within and Thriving Coaches.

Author of Thriving Work.


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